The Long Goodbye

Modern Family 9×2

Phil: What do we have here? An electric mitten holder.
Alex: It's a rock-paper-scissors robot I just built.
Phil: What?!
Alex: Its sensors anticipate your next move.
Phil: Maybe for civilians...

Jay: Gun to my head, my top three: Cheddar, Swiss, Gouda.
Gloria: As someone who has actually had a gun to her head, cheese is not what they're going to ask about.

Jay: We dropped you off at college two hours ago. My God, even Haley lasted longer.
Manny: I needed my white noise machine.
Gloria: Or did you need your brown noise machine?
Manny: No, and I think I'm offended for you.

Cameron: I-I-I think I accidentally, on purpose, subconsciously, willfully, burned our kitchen down.
Mitchell: Okay. I-I don't... I don't know about that. Um...
Cameron: No. Let's face it. Like Drew Barrymore, I'm an adorable fire starter.

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On the IMDb