Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 18

Twin Peaks 3×18

MIKE: Is it... future? Or is it... past?

The Arm: Is it a story about the little girl... who lives down the lane? Is it?

Agent Cooper: Exactly 430 miles.

Agent Cooper: Richard? Linda?

Carrie Page: What’s going on?
Agent Cooper: It’s difficult to explain. As strange as it sounds, I think you’re a girl named Laura Palmer.

---

Carrie Page: Where we going?
Agent Cooper: Twin Peaks, Washington.
Carrie Page: D.C.?
Agent Cooper: No, state. Washington State.
Carrie Page: It’s a long way?
Agent Cooper: It’s a ways away.

Agent Cooper: What year is this?

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 17

Twin Peaks 3×17

Albert: I said, «You’ve gone soft in your old age.»
Director Cole: Not where it counts, buddy.

Director Cole: This plan, Albert, I couldn’t tell you about, and I’m sorry.
Albert: I understand.
Director Cole: I know you understand, Albert, yet I’m still sorry.

Agent Headley: We found him. We found Douglas Jones. But... we don’t know where he is.
Albert: Has my watch stopped, or is that one of the Marx Brothers?

Bushnell Mullins: Dougie wanted me to read you this... «I am headed for Sheriff Truman’s. It is 2:53 in Las Vegas, and that adds up to a ten, the number of completion.»

Director Cole: Dougie is Cooper?! How the hell is this?!

Tammy: He electrocuted himself by sticking a fork... in a wall socket.
Albert: That’s strange, even for Cooper.
Director Cole: A Blue Rose case, most definitely.

Agent Cooper: Harry, it’s Coop... Federal Bureau of Investigation, Special Agent Dale Cooper.
Sheriff Truman: This is Frank Truman, Harry’s brother. Where are you?
Agent Cooper: We’re just entering Twin Peaks city limits. Is the coffee on?

---

Sheriff Truman: I think this one’s dead, Agent Cooper.

Lucy: Andy... I understand cellular phones now.

Bobby: What’s going on around here?
Bradley: Took the fucking words right out of my mouth.

Agent Cooper: Now, there are some things that will change. The past dictates the future.

Candie: It’s a good thing we made so many sandwiches.

WE LIVE INSIDE A DREAM.

Agent Cooper: I hope I see all of you again... every one of you.

Agent Cooper: See you at the curtain call.

MIKE: Through the darkness of future past,
              the magician longs to see.
              One chants out
              between two worlds...
            «Fire... walk with me.»

Phillip: Cooper... remember.
MIKE: E. Le. Ctri. City.

Laura Palmer: You don’t even know me. There are things about me... Even Donna doesn’t know me.

Laura Palmer: Where are we going?
Agent Cooper: We’re going home.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 16

Twin Peaks 3×16

Richard: So we’re here. What now?
Evil Cooper: Pay attention. You’ll find out.

Janey-E: ...when people go into a coma, they can stay there for years.
Bushnell: Oh, Dougie’s not gonna do that.

Bradley: What the fuck kind of neighborhood is this?
Rodney: People are under a lot of stress, Bradley.
Bradley: Yeah.

Agent Cooper: You’re a fine man, Bushnell Mullins. I will not soon forget your kindness and decency.
Bushnell: What about the FBI?
Agent Cooper: I am the FBI.

---

Agent Cooper: You’ve made my heart so full.

Agent Cooper: We’re a family. Dougie... I mean... I will be back.

Janey-E: Don’t go.
Agent Cooper: I have to.

Rodney: Dougie, let me get this straight—
Bradley: Wait, wait, wait, I want to hear this, too. Candie, where’s my Bloody Mary?...
Rodney: Okay. You don’t sell insurance... You’re an FBI agent... who’s been missing for 25 years... and we need to get you to a town called Twin Peaks, to a sheriff’s station. Dougie... we love you, but we are not traditionally welcome at such places. Or by such aforementioned people... law enforcement types.
Agent Cooper: I read you 100 percent. Friends, that’s about to change. I am witness to the fact that you both have hearts of gold.
Candie: They do. They really do.

Roadhouse MC: Ladies and gentlemen, the Roadhouse is proud to welcome... Edward. Louis. Severson.

Roadhouse MC: Ladies and gentlemen, Audrey’s dance...

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 15

Twin Peaks 3×15

Nadine: I’m fine now. You asked about this shovel. Well, I’m shoveling myself out of the shit!

Ed: Nadine...
Nadine: Don’t worry about me. Run to her. Enjoy the rest of your lives together! I am so happy just thinking of you two being happy. Ed, I love you and always will, but true love is giving the other what makes them happy!

Nadine: So, the gist of it is: Ed, you are free! Go and enjoy!

Shelly: What can I get you, Ed?
Ed: Cup of coffee.
Shelly: Coming right up.
Ed: And a cyanide tablet.

Ed: Marry me.
Norma: ..... Of course I will.

---

Steven: It’s gonna end it. And when I... When I see you come up... But... but... I may not even see you there, I mean... I mean... I mean gone. Where will I be? Will I be with the rhinoceros? The lightning in the bottle, hm?.. Or will I be completely, uh, like... like... Turquoise? Hm?

Roadhouse MC: Next on the Roadhouse playlist is one of our favorites. «Sharp Dressed Man» by ZZ Top!

Chantal: Hi, hun... Hold on.... Yeah, one down, one to go. Yeah, French fries. And extra ketchup.

Margaret: Hawk. I’m dying.
Hawk: I’m sorry, Margaret.
Margaret: You know about death, that it’s just a change, not an end... There’s some fear, some fear in letting go.

Margaret: Remember what I told you... Watch for that one, the one I told you about, the one under the moon on Blue Pine Mountain.

Margaret: Good night, Hawk.
Hawk: Good night, Margaret. Good-bye, Margaret.

Hawk: Margaret Lanterman passed away tonight.
Lucy: The Log Lady’s dead?!

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 14

Twin Peaks 3×14

& Lucy: Sheriff Truman? FBI Director Gordon Cole is on line one. That’s the blinking one, the one that’s blinking right now.

& Albert: ...Those two arresting officers were Gordon Cole and Phillip Jeffries. Now, what’s the one question you should ask me?
    Tammy: .... What’s the significance of the blue rose?
    Albert: And the answer?...
    Tammy: Hmm. Blue rose does not occur in nature. It’s not a natural thing. ...

& Director Cole: ...they are onto something from Laura Palmer’s diary indicating two Coopers. And last night, I had another Monica Bellucci dream....
    Albert: Oh, boy.

& Director Cole: Monica ..... said the ancient phrase...
    Monica Bellucci: We’re like the dreamer, who dreams and then lives inside the dream.
    Director Cole: ... I told her I understood. And then she said...
    Monica Bellucci: But... who is the dreamer?

& Bobby: All right. Turkey and cheese. Ham and cheese. Roast beef and cheese. And just cheese.
    Hawk: Who ordered just cheese?

---

& Sheriff Truman: What happened to us back there?
    Hawk: I don’t know. Something. But I don’t remember a thing.
    Sheriff Truman: Same with me.

& Freddie: I was still living at home, see? That would be London Town, East End. .... Now, where I come from, we call a bloke like this a «jobsworth.» That is a person who delights in acting in an obstructive or otherwise unhelpful manner, as in, «I can’t do that. It’s more than my job’s worth.»

& Freddie: ...And then, in that moment, I remember something else that bloke up in the sky told me. «Once you’ve got the glove on, go to Twin Peaks, Washington, United States of America. And there, you will find your destiny.»

& Sarah Palmer: Would you sit back where you were, please?
    Trucker: I’ll sit wherever I want. It’s a free country. It’s a free country. It’s a free cunt-ry... Maybe you’re one of them bull dykes. Yeah. Come to think of it, you look kind of like a bull dyke lesbo.

& Sarah Palmer: Do you really want to fuck with this?

& MC: Ladies and gentlemen, the Roadhouse is proud to welcome Lissie!...

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 13

Twin Peaks 3×13

& Bradley: A wrong has been made right, and the sun is shining bright.

& Evil Cooper: Starting position... Starting position’s more comfortable.... It hurt my arm when you moved it down here. But it really hurt when you had it down here. See?... Doesn’t that hurt your arm when I go like that? I think it’s much worse when it’s down here.... Let’s go back to starting positions. It’s really much more comfortable.

& Chantal: Utah. Mormons. They don’t drink liquor. They don’t drink coffee. They don’t drink Coca-Cola. And... they don’t even have sex before marriage.
    Hutchens: Yeah, but when they do get married, I heard they... they can marry, like, six or ten women.
    Chantal: Funny there’s not more of them... I guess it’s the drinks.

& Dougie: Coffee!

---

& Shelly: No, you know what? Why don’t you come down here, and I’m gonna serve you up a beautiful piece of cherry pie, a scoop of vanilla ice cream, and lots of whipped cream...

& Norma: All my ingredients are natural, organic, local.
    Walter: I know. You make them with love. ... Norma... you’re a real artist. But love doesn’t always turn a profit.

& Audrey: I feel like I’m somewhere else. Have you ever had that feeling, Charlie?
    Charlie: No.
    Audrey: Like I’m somewhere else and... and like I’m somebody else. Have you ever felt that?
    Charlie: No. I always feel like myself. And it may not always be the best feeling.
    Audrey: Well, I’m not sure who I am, but I’m not me.
    Charlie: This is Existentialism 101.
    Audrey: Oh, fuck you! I’m serious! Who am I supposed to trust but myself? And I don’t even know who I am! So what the fuck am I supposed to do?

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 12

Twin Peaks 3×12

& Director Cole: Please speak succinctly, and do not make any loud, sharp noises.

& Director Cole: To Tammy and the Blue Rose!

& Albert: Care for a drink?
    Diane: I like it on the rocks.
    Albert: Well, you’re in luck. The Dakotas are still in the Ice Age.

& Diane: What’s in it for me?
    Albert: Some cash. Not much. Maybe the satisfaction of learning what happened to your friend Cooper.
    Diane: .... Let’s rock.

& Carl: Keep your blood, Kriscol.

& Ben: The key here. Showed up in the mail the other day. We haven’t used a key like this in over 20 years. Room 315. I’m pretty sure that this is the key to Agent Cooper’s old room. I thought Harry would like to have it as a memento...

---

& Director Cole: Sweetheart, would you excuse us for a moment? I’ll call you in the bar.
    French Woman: .... Oui, Mon chéri.
    Director Cole: .... Très chic!
    French Woman: .... Très bon.
    Director Cole: It’s a good one!

& Director Cole: She’s here visiting a friend of her mother whose daughter has gone missing! The mother owns a turnip farm! I told her to tell the mother that her daughter will turn up eventually!........ She didn’t get it either. Being French, it doesn’t translate!

& Director Cole: Do you realize, Albert, that there are more than 6,000 languages spoken on Earth today?!
    Albert: ................

& Director Cole: ...for now, I’d really like to get back to this fine Bordeaux!
    Albert: What kind is it?
    Director Cole: 11:05!
    Albert: ................
    Director Cole: Albert... sometimes I really worry about you.

& Dr. Amp: Friends, we all live in the mud. In the shit! Shovel your way out of the shit... This is your shiny gold shovel. Two coats, guaranteed. Shovel your way out of the shit and into the truth. Dig yourself out of the shit... $29.99. That’s right. Only $29.99 plus shipping. Accept no substitute. Get yours now!

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 11

Twin Peaks 3×11

& Macklay: Listen, I need all available backup at 2240 Sycamore, 2240 Sycamore.
    Diane: There’s no backup for this.

& Director Cole: What the hell happened, Macklay?!.. He’s dead.

& Sheriff Truman: What is this?
    Deputy Hawk: Frank... you don’t ever want to know about that.
    Sheriff Truman: Really?
    Deputy Hawk: Really.

& Margaret: My log is afraid of fire. There’s fire where you are going. Hawk, there’s fire where you are going.

& Director Cole: Cat on a hot tin roof. It’s never done that before.

& Bradley: Rodney... I had a dream.
    Rodney: Did ya?
    Bradley: Had it all fuckin’ night.

---

& Bradley: I can’t wait to kill this guy.
    Rodney: ... Can you last three more hours?
    Bradley: Barely.

& ’Battling Bud’ Bushnell: I’m in your corner, champ. Knock ’em dead.
    Agent Cooper: ... Dead.

& Old Lady: ...I have a little dog. I have a house. I have my life back again. How can I ever thank you?.. I hope you realize what a special person you having dining with you. He saved my life.
    Bradley: Sure saved us a lot too.
    Old Lady: Thank you. Thank you, Mr. Jackpots.

& Agent Cooper: Mmm.
    Rodney: This pie is so damn good.
    Agent Cooper: Damn good.

& Rodney: A toast... Dougie. Here’s to the pie that saved your life, Dougie.
    Bradley: And... our money.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 10

Twin Peaks 3×10

& Janey-E: How much weight has he lost? I-I-I think he’s lost a lot of weight. In a good way.

& Dr. Ben: One ten over 70. Perfect. Remarkable.
    Janey-E: Remarkable...

& Bradley: Turns out, our Mr. Jones is actually... Mr. Jones.
    Rodney: What a fuckin’ world.

& Janey-E: Dougie? I love you.
    Agent Cooper: Love you.

& Dr. Amp: And the fucks are at it again! Fuck you who betray the people you were elected to help!
    We’re sheep to these monsters, and they don’t give a shit! We grow our wool, and just when we’re getting warm, they come along with their electric clippers and shear our wool off, and we’re just naked, screaming little fucks! No wool for us! Freezing and hungry! In the night. In the dark. And they don’t give a shit!...

---

& Chad: ...I bet you and Andy wake up each morning and say, «Oh, what a beautiful day it is.»
    Lucy: That depends on what time it is. I mean, sometimes there’s not even enough time to think of anything.

& Rodney: Okay. Mr. Insurance Man, what do you want?

& Bradley: You fuck us once, shame on us. You fuck us twice... shame on you. You’re dead.

& Margaret: Hawk... Electricity is humming. You hear it in the mountains and rivers. You see it dance among the seas and stars and glowing around the moon... but in these days, the glow is dying. What will be in the darkness that remains?
    The Truman brothers are both true men. They are your brothers. And the others, the good ones who have been with you. Now the circle is almost complete. Watch and listen to the dream of time... and space. It all comes out now, flowing like a river. That which is and is not.
    Hawk... Laura is the one.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 9

Twin Peaks 3×9

& Tammy: Try to keep your voice down.
    Director Cole: What?!

& Director Cole: Hello?! Colonel?! What have you got?!.. I don’t appreciate your language one bit, Colonel!... Oh, a place. Buckhorn!.. Buckhorn, South Dakota!.. West South Dakota!

& Albert: I know. I know. «Fuck you, Albert.»

& Macklay: William Hastings was having an affair with the local librarian, Ruth Davenport. Now, Davenport’s head was found atop the headless body of your Major Briggs. Once we took Hastings into custody, his wife was murdered in their house, apparently by their lawyer, a man named George Bouncer, who is now also in custody. And the next day, Hastings’ secretary died in a car explosion.
    Albert: What happens in season two?
    Director Cole: Apologies in advance for Albert!

& Director Cole: Albert!... Let’s think out loud!!

---

& Sheriff Truman: Hey, Lucy.
    Lucy: Sheriff Truman, I’m not here. I’m on my lunch break.

& Sheriff Truman: «Two hundred fifty-three yards east of Jack Rabbit’s Palace. Before leaving Jack Rabbit’s Palace, put some soil from that area in your pocket.» And two dates. And a time. Same time. 2:53. That’s two days from now, and the day after... Jack Rabbit’s Palace?.. I never heard of such a place.

& Sheriff Truman: Wait a minute. There’s something else... «COOPER/COOPER.»
    Deputy Hawk: Two Coopers.

& Albert: Fruitcake, anyone?

& Ella: What’s the big fucking deal? I mean, I did the fucking work. Like, how can you fuck up serving burgers, you know what I mean?
    Chloe: Totally.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 8

Twin Peaks 3×8

& Evil Cooper: There are three tracking devices on this car...

& Girl (1956): Oh, look. I found a penny. And it’s head’s up. That means it’s good luck.

& Woodsman: Got a light? Got a light? Got a light?

---

& Woodsman: This is the water. And this is the well. Drink full and descend. The horse is the white of the eyes and dark within. This is the water....

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 7

Twin Peaks 3×7

& Sheriff Truman: Laura never met Cooper. He came here after she died, didn’t he?
    Deputy Hawk: She said that these words from Annie came to her in a dream. This thing she said... «the good Dale is in the lodge and can’t come out.» But Harry saw Cooper come out of the lodge with Annie that night. Doc and Harry took him over to the Great Northern, but if the good Cooper is in the lodge and can’t come out, then the one who came out of the lodge with Annie that night... was not the good Cooper.
    Sheriff Truman: And he left town soon after.

& Sheriff Truman: Uh, do you know what Skype is, Doc?
    Doc Hayward: I use it all the time.

& Sheriff Truman: Keep working the sunny side of the river, Doc.

& Director Cole: How did it go?
    Albert: Not well. I said, «Hello, Diane.» She said, «This is about Cooper, isn’t it?» I said, «Maybe.» She said, and I quote, «No fucking way.»
    Director Cole: Oh.

& Director Cole: Now, take it easy, Diane, and let’s just sit down and have a nice, simple chat. You got any coffee?
    Diane: No. I don’t have any cigarettes either.
    Director Cole: Ah, the memory of tobacco. But I gave it up.
    Diane: Fuck you, Gordon.
    Albert: Now you’re getting the personal treatment.
    Diane: Oh, you want personal? Fuck you, too, Albert.
    Director Cole: Now that we got the pleasantries out of the way...
    Albert: I never even got this far.

---

& Diane: That is not the Dale Cooper that I knew. ... It isn’t time passing... or how he’s changed... or the way he looks. It’s something here. There’s something that definitely isn’t here.

& Diane: Cheers. To the FBI.

& Janey-E: Ah, it’s a terrible car, always in the shop... Silver, four-door, cheap Ford, the kind they call down at that dealer a «previously owned» car.

& Benjamin: Room 315... Wait a minute. I think that was the room where Agent Cooper was shot.
    Beverly: Who’s Agent Cooper?
    Benjamin: FBI. He was here, I don’t know, maybe 25 years ago... investigating the murder of Laura Palmer.
    Beverly: Who’s Laura Palmer?
    Benjamin: Oh, that, my dear... is a long story.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 6

Twin Peaks 3×6

& Janey-E: Tomorrow’s a big day.
   Agent Cooper: Big day.
   Janey-E: Oh, Dougie...
   Agent Cooper: Big day.
   Janey-E: Yes, sweetheart.

& Red: This is you. This is me. Heads, I win. Tails, you lose.

& Agent Cooper: Make... sense of it.

& Agent Cooper: Help. Dougie.

& Janey-E: You get this straight. My husband has a job, he has a wife, he has a child, he does not make enough money to pay back $52,000 for anything. We are not wealthy people. We drive cheap, terrible cars. We are the 99 percenters! And we are shit on enough! And we are certainly not gonna be shit on by the likes of you!
   Jimmy: Nevertheless, lady...
   Janey-E: So here’s what we’re gonna do...

---

& Janey-E: At my bank, where we make less than one percent interest on what little money we have, people would be turning cartwheels just to get 25 percent interest on any loan, and that is what I’m generously gonna give to you right now, $25,000. That is my first, last, and only offer to you.

& Janey-E: What kind of world are we living in where people can behave like this? Treat other people this way without any compassion or feeling for their suffering?.. We are living in a dark, dark age, and you are part of the problem.

& Janey-E: I suggest you take a good, long look at yourselves because I never want to see either of you again!

& Jimmy: Tough dame...
   Tommy: Tough.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 5

Twin Peaks 3×5

& Constance: Cause of death... Took me a while, but I think someone cut this man’s head off. Here’s the headline... Actually, I just gave you the headline... Yeah, I’m still doing stand-up on the weekends.

& Dr. Amp: Friends, we all live in the mud. In the shit! Shovel your way out of the shit.... This is your shiny, gold shovel. Two coats, guaranteed. Shovel your way out of the shit and into the truth. Dig yourself out of the shit... $29.99. That’s right. Only $29.99 plus shipping. Accept no substitute. Get yours now.

---

& Cooper: The cow jumped over the moon.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 4

Twin Peaks 3×4

& Supervisor: How many jackpots?
    Floor Attendant: So far, 29 mega jackpots.
    Supervisor: I’m dead. ......
    Floor Attendant: Now 30.

& Janey-E Jones: This is the most wonderful... horrible day of my life.
    Agent Cooper: Of my life.

& Denise: Well, I know your profile, Gordon. Beautiful agent, barely 30...
    Director Cole: I’m old-school, Denise. You know that. Before you were Denise, when you were Dennis and I was your boss, when I had you working undercover at the DEA, you were a confused and wild thing sometimes. I had enough dirt on you to fill the Grand Canyon, and I never used a spoonful because you were and are a great agent. And when you became Denise, I told all of your colleagues, those clown comics, to fix their hearts or die.

---

& Denise: I’m speaking more as a woman now than as the chief of staff of the entire Federal Bureau of Investigation. Don’t you just love sometimes saying «Federal Bureau of Investigation» like that all at once? Unabbreviated? Oh. It just gives me such a thrill.

& Denise: Will Albert be with you?
    Director Cole: Do birds fly?
    Denise: Good luck.
    Director Cole: Ten-four, good buddy.

& Andy: Cell phones... that means they’re mobile, punky. The sheriff can be moving. It’s not like your phone. He can be moving and even driving while he’s talking. Lucy... you’re so good at your job in every other way. I just don’t understand how this keeps happening... over and over again.

& Director Cole: Albert, I hate to admit this, but I don’t understand this situation at all.
    Albert: No.
    Director Cole: Do you understand this situation, Albert?
    Albert: ... Blue Rose.
    Director Cole: It doesn’t get any bluer.

--
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 3

Twin Peaks 3×3

& Dougie: That’s weird.

& Agent Cooper: Jade give two rides.

& Drugged-out Mother: One-one-nine! One-one-nine! One-one-nine! One-one-nine!

& Andy: We laid everything out, Hawk, and we can’t find anything that’s missing.
    Hawk: If it’s not here, then... how do you know it’s missing? ......
    Lucy: But if it is here... then it isn’t missing?

& Hawk: No. It’s not about the bunny. You ate the evidence, Lucy?

---

& Lucy: I had read... that sometimes chocolate, which I love, can be used as a remedy, maybe by indigenous people. Is that true, Hawk? Do you use chocolate as a remedy for gas?

& Hawk: It’s not about the bunny. Is it about the bunny?... No. It’s not about the bunny.

& — Director Cole? On your phone, it’s Cooper.

& Albert: The absurd mystery of the strange forces of existence... How about a truckload full of Valium?

--
On the IMDb
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 2

Twin Peaks 3×2

& Phyllis: Life in prison, Bill. Life in prison.

& Jack Cooper: You did good. You follow human nature perfectly.

& Jack Cooper: Want, not need. I don’t need anything, Ray. If there’s one thing you should know about me, Ray... it’s that I don’t need anything. I want.

---

& Laura Palmer: Hello... Agent Cooper. You can... go out... now.

& Jack Cooper: The game begins...

& Darya: But... you said you were going away somewhere tomorrow.
    Jack Cooper: Tomorrow, I’m supposed to get pulled back into what they call the Black Lodge. But I’m not going back there. I’ve got a plan for that one.

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+ quotes on the IMDb
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Twin Peaks. The Return. Part 1

Twin Peaks 3×1

& Sam: You’re a bad girl, Tracey.
    Tracey: Try me.

& Businessman: Sheriff Truman isn’t here?
    Lucy: Well, do you know which one? It could make a difference.
    Businessman: Uh, no, ma’am.
    Lucy: One is sick, and the other one is fishing.
    Businessman: Uh...
    Lucy: It could make a difference...

& Sam: I’m supposed to watch the box and see if anything appears inside.

---

& Margaret: Hawk. My log has a message for you.

& Margaret: Something is missing, and you have to find it. It has to do with Special Agent     Dale Cooper. ... The way you will find it... has something to do with your heritage... This is the message from the log.

& Lucy: But Agent Cooper is missing. And he hasn’t been seen or heard from since before Wally was born, and Wally’s 24 years old.

--
On the IMDb
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