Sex Education #3.8

Jackson: So... I acted a bit like an idiot yesterday.
Cal: Mm-hmm. I think your cishet brain maybe exploded a bit. You didn't have to run away.

Otis Milburn: How are you a failure?
Hope Haddon: Because my... my body won't... won't... It doesn't do the... the one thing it's supposed to do. The one thing I want it to do. But you can't have everything, I suppose. And dwelling on it makes me weak.
Otis Milburn: I don't think you're weak. I think saying you feel disappointed by something you want but maybe can't have makes you honest. And admitting your vulnerabilities makes you courageous.

Otis Milburn: There's someone called Maeve, and she's really important to me. I know I don't really understand anything about love, but I think she's my person.
Jean Milburn: Oh, sweetheart. I don't know if any of us understand much about love. I just know we feel it when we feel it. I can't wait to meet her.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #3.7

Eric Effoing: What kind of kiss? A peck-on-the-cheek kiss or a kiss-kiss?
Otis Milburn: Um, it was a kiss-kiss.

Aimee Gibbs: It's like Simone de Beauvoir says, "From the hour you're born, you begin to die." I think it means "live for the day." Yeah. Once I realized she wasn't a lad called Simon, her writing started to make a lot more sense.

Michael Groff: I just wanted to see you. And I just wanted to say that I know I was hard to live with, that I'm rigid, and I'm uptight. I don't know how to be spontaneous or anything close to happy. But I do want to change. I want to try to be the man that you want.

Otis Milburn: If I can't be with you romantically, I still wanna see you every day. Nothing feels right when you're not around.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #3.6

Adam Groff: Um, I can't read that word.
Hope Haddon: It says that you are unhygienic.

Police Officer: Sorry, how are you both connected to the case again?
Otis Milburn: I'm Maeve's friend. He is her complicated love interest.
Isaac Goodwin: You used to be her friend until you were an arsehole at that party.

Hope Haddon: Oh, one more thing, Vivienne. I want you to make a presentation to the press and prospective students on our upcoming open day.
Viv Odusanya: Even after this?
Hope Haddon: Yes. You're our head girl. And having a strong, smart, young woman of color leading the way shows how progressive we are as a school.
Viv Odusanya: So it's about how it looks.
Hope Haddon: Of course it is.

Hope Haddon: Why would I want to come and listen to a bunch of teenagers whinging on about their insignificant problems for an hour? No, thank you. I've had quite enough of this navel-gazing, identity-obsessed hysteria for one day. The quicker you and your fragile, petty little peers realize that you're not that special and that the real world doesn't care about your supposed issues, the better.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #3.5

Cal: Jackson.
Jackson: What?
Cal: Have you ever noticed how we're on a trip, but we're on a trip?
Jackson: Fuck, that's so deep.
Cal: Yeah...

Jakob Nyman: Hey, what's happening?
Jean Milburn: I just had the most horrible experience with a doctor, and I am making a formal complaint.
Jakob Nyman: Sorry. We are upset.
Jean Milburn: No, we are not upset. I am upset. And my anger is appropriate. Can you help us? Thank you.
Male Nurse: Let me call my supervisor.
Jean Milburn: Oh! Ha! That is fantastic. Yes, ignore the pregnant woman, and listen to the straight white man, for fuck's sakes.

Colin Hendricks: Thank you, Adam Groff, for owning up to doing this huge poo and undermining my authority. Thank you. Cheers, buddy.

Emily Sands: When I decided to be a teacher... I dreamt of helping students fulfill their potential by gently drawing out their inner creative gifts. Instead, I'm plunging their shit.
Colin Hendricks: You are majestic.

Ola Nyman: My mum always used to say, "If you love someone, it's better to bend a bit than break." That's if you really like them, obviously.

Kyle: All right, listen up, everyone. I've had an epiphany on this trip... We're all gonna die. ... Life is so short. We might not be dead yet, like those poor, young soldiers, but one day we will be. So, my point is... ... My... my point is that we should try and live in the moment because we don't have long. So, if you love someone, you should tell 'em that you love 'em. Tell 'em now. Because it might be too late. Life is fragile.

Colin Hendricks: Let's just forget that happened, all right? I know this trip has been hard for some of you. But we're only half an hour away from the White Cliffs of Dover. So, let's fix up, tidy up our uniforms, and get our general shit together. Yeah? Cheers.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #3.4

Otis Milburn: Ruby, please can we talk?
Ruby Matthews: Not now, Otis! I've got to go and protect myself from your penis!

Jakob Nyman: You did the right thing.
Otis Milburn: I don't know. She was really upset.
Jakob Nyman: Well, people deserve your whole heart, Otis. If you can't give them that, it's better they know. It's the kinder thing to do.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #3.3

Aimee Gibbs: Do you know most women's vulvas don't look like they do on PornHub? I thought mine was a bit ugly because it's not all tucked in, but it's dead normal.
Maeve Wiley: You should read Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski. It's a great book. I'll lend it to you.

Hope Haddon: I know this probably feels like a big change, but you'll find that having a uniform creates a sense of unity and equilibrium. And speaking of changes, the choir will now sing the new school anthem, "Non Sibi, sed Toti."

Ruby Matthews: Why are they singing in elf language?
Otis Milburn: I think it's Latin.
Ruby Matthews: Well, what does it mean?
Anwar: "Not for oneself, but for all."

Ruby Matthews: There's nothing gluten-free!
Adam Groff: How long have you been diabetic?
Ruby Matthews: I'm not diabetic.
Adam Groff: You can't eat sugar.
Eric Effoing: Gluten, Adam. Not glucose.
Adam Groff: Does anyone else... like the smell of their own farts?... You told me to ask questions.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #3.2

Otis Milburn: Mum, can you please not therapize my friend?

Eric Effoing: Hey, why's these lines on the floors?
Otis Milburn: Think we're supposed to walk single file.

Hope Haddon: I wanted to hear your initial thoughts on the new hallway guidelines.
Jackson: Uh, they're interesting.
Hope Haddon: Interesting is a non-word, Jackson. Tell me what you really think.

Jean Milburn: Right, "I See You" is an exercise where you stare into each other's eyes and articulate the emotions that come up.

Jakob Nyman: Oh, this is dumb.
Jean Milburn: Come on. Let's be serious.

Rahim: This line is not about unity. It's about control. We're going to be put into tiny little boxes.
Ruby Matthews: I think it's just a line.
Rahim: Nothing is ever just a line.

Adam Groff: You should wear your normal clothes again. That top makes your neck look very long.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #3.1

Eric Effoing: Oatcake, what's on your face?
Otis Milburn: It's a mustache. I've been growing it all summer, but somebody has been too busy having sex with their new boyfriend to notice.
Eric Effoing: Uh, I was hoping it was a phase.

Adam Groff: All right, New Kid? What is that on your face?

Eric Effoing: Oh my God! What? How? When?

Otis Milburn: Oh. Hi, Ruby, what are you?
Ruby Matthews: I'm early 2000s Christina Aguilera.
Otis Milburn: Very cool. I'm macaroni cheese.
Ruby Matthews: Shut up and have sex with me.
Otis Milburn: What are you sad about tonight?
Ruby Matthews: I'm a teenage girl, Otis. I'm always sad--
Eric: Wait. Why were you macaroni cheese?

Peter Groff: Know what the secret to a happy marriage is?
Michael Groff: I'm not really the best person to answer that, Peter.
Peter Groff: Money. Well, that and keeping the toilet seat down, but mostly fucking money...

Ruby Matthews: I'm a very private person, Otis.
Otis Milburn: I think you're embarrassed.
Ruby Matthews: Okay, fine. I'm embarrassed! I am hot and popular, and you are a badly-dressed stick man with a creepy mustache.

Otis Milburn: We're done.
Ruby Matthews: And we're not done. We're over!
Otis Milburn: "Over" and "done" mean the same thing!

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #2.8

Otis: Withholding of information is not technically a lie. And implementing an avoidance strategy will only suppress your negative emotions towards me, not make them dissipate.
Jean: Oh, you're going to therapize me. Go ahead. Have a seat. Show me your skills.

Otis: Fine. Okay, yes, I spoke to people at school. I gave out some advice. You can't arrest me for talking to people.
Jean: You don't invoice for a casual conversation.

Otis: Why do I always end up pissing everyone off?
Ola: I think you're always trying so hard to be a good guy that you end up not being a good guy.

Miss Sands: Remember, guys, today is about having fun... But it's also really important that we win. This is not a drill, guys. This is the endgame.

Adam: Still play the French horn?
Eric: I didn't think you knew what it was.
Adam: Trombone sounded funny.

Remi: Of course I like you. I just...
Otis: Then how could you leave me?
Remi: ... Because I'm an arsehole. I'm sure there are multiple ways of diagnosing my personality, but the chief ingredient is arsehole.
Otis: How do I not become an arsehole?
Remi: Just try and stay honest. 'Cause once you start lying, it's... it's very hard to stop.

---

Remi: When you're young... you think that everybody out there really... really gets you. But, you know, actually, only a handful of them do. All the people who like you, despite your faults. And then if you discard them, they will never come back. So, when you meet those people... you should just hold on to them. Really, really tightly. And don't let them go.

Viv: We're not giving up. We came here to win. And if we're not gonna win, at least we're gonna fight. ... And more important than that, we're a team. So, if we're gonna go down, we're gonna go down together.
Steve: Sorry, you kind of turned into Braveheart there. I love that film.
Viv: Pull yourself together, Steve.

Maxine: I thought this was Shakespeare?...
Mr. Groff: Uh, yes. I think our students are taking a postmodern approach.

Maureen: When you love a person, there's always a tiny part of you that's terrified that one day you're gonna lose them. And I think that your father's so scared of that emotion that... he stops himself feeling anything at all. But you have to let the people you love know that you love them, even if it causes you a great deal of pain.
Adam: Why? It sounds awful.
Maureen: Because you're alive.

Adam: I want to hold your hand.

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #2.7

Otis: We had sex without a condom?!

Eric: But you are not a virgin anymore! What?That's exciting, right?
Otis: It's not. Sex has consequences.

Miss Sands: No one has anything to say? Fine. You will circle every "A" in the paper until one of you owns up.
Maeve: That's not very productive, miss.
Miss Sands: Neither is slut-shaming your teacher. Get circling, girls. I'll be back to check on you.

Pharmacist: I can't sell it to you.
Otis: Why not?
Pharmacist: You don't have a vagina, sir.

Otis: I also want you to know if you are pregnant and chose to keep the baby, I'll quit school, get a job and provide for you both.

Pharmacist: That'll be £25.
Ruby: It's his penis, he's paying for it.

Viv: You guys are such clichés. Except for you, Lily. You're genuinely weird.
Olivia: What category are you in, Pythagoras, other than freak?
Viv: The really, really intelligent one.

---

Miss Sands: Anyone have anything to admit?... You can circle the "I"s next.

Mr. Hendricks: How long have you got?
Miss Sands: I gave them an impossible assignment about female solidarity, they won't finish for ages.
Mr. Hendricks: You're so evil.
Miss Sands: Say it again.

Eric: We can't touch each other in church.

Otis: You did give me consent, right? I'm kind of worried you didn't.

Otis: Was I... Was I okay at the sex bit? ....
Ruby: You weren't great, but you weren't terrible. You kept asking me if I was okay.
Otis: It's important to check in.
Ruby: It was every ten seconds.

Lily: I think if I had an extra arm growing in between my legs... I might want to show everyone too.

Jakob: I feel like I don't know him at all, like... like I've got a stranger living in my house.
Jean: I think we can't ever truly know these creatures that we created.

Jakob: Talk to him. That's all you can do.

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #2.6

Eric: Don't cook a roast chicken. Cooking a roast chicken is not chill.

Otis: Hey, guys. Um... weird question. What do you know about anal douching?

Otis: If I'm not cooking a roast chicken, what are people going to eat?
Eric: Crisps. Otis, just crisps.

Otis: Squat, don't rush, push it in, compress the bulb. Pull to take it out.
Mr. Hendricks: What's going on?
Rahim: I'm teaching Otis how to douche.

Jean: A party?
Otis: No. Just a gathering.

Isaac: Seriously, my brain's a precious commodity, and it's slowly dying from boredom. Don't let it die, Maeve.
Maeve: ... all of our brains are slowly dying. You're not unique.

Isaac: People need people.
Maeve: Is that another NA motivational quote by any chance?
Isaac: No, more of a core value, actually.

Dex: Forty-three quintillion possible combinations, but in theory, it can be solved in just 20 moves.

Ola: I didn't know you were having a party...
Otis: Oh, hi, Ola. It was very spontaneous. Just... casual. It was a chill decision.

Rahim: If you are not ready to talk about douching with your boyfriend, you're definitely not ready to have his cock in your arse.

Adam: I'm scared. And I think I'm bisexual.

Adam: I feel like everyone hates me.
Eric: Well, it's kind of hard to like someone who doesn't like themselves.

Ola: You're welcome to him.

Adam: Do you wanna go smash some shit?

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #2.5

Jean: Behold, the clitoris...

Maureen: I was wondering... if your bike has been sitting in the garden for six years, it's probably going to be quite rusty, isn't it?
Jean: Is the bike in question your vagina?

Adam: Dreams aren't real. That's why they're called dreams.

Ola: Do you think it means something if I'm having sex dreams about girls?
Adam: I don't know. Go and ask Google like everyone else.

Eric: Why is your face not moving?

Maureen: I'm divorcing your father. Would you like some mango?

Ola: You said you had to think about it, and it was difficult. It shouldn't be difficult, Otis. We're 16.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #2.4

Jean: You won't know unless you ask.

Florence: I thought it was a play about love but apparently, it's all about sex. And now, the whole cast seem to be thinking about sex every second of every day.

Jean: Try not to think about what other people are doing. Run your own race, and when you meet the right person, I'm sure you'll be ready.

Florence: I'm the best actor in this school. I'm basically Meryl Streep but young... and Scottish.

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #2.3

Eric: I can't believe you finally get a girlfriend and she's basically your sister. LOLs. LOLs.

Maeve: I hate birthdays.
Otis: No one hates birthdays, Maeve.
Maeve: Why celebrate the day I got pushed out of some random vagina against my will?

Aimee: It's basically like he sneezed on me or something.
Maeve: He came on you, Aimee!
Aimee: Cum is kind of like a penis having a sneeze.
Maeve: Ugh!
Aimee: That means when you swallow someone's cum, it's like eating their snot.

Maeve: Men are so weird...
Aimee: I think he's cute.
Maeve: Why do people always think old men are cute? How do you know he hasn't jizzed on someone on a bus before?
Aimee: I meant the lizard.

Otis: That's normal to feel observed and vulnerable when you're having sex. And he probably feels just as silly sometimes, too. We... we might think we look stupid or unappealing, but sex isn't always perfect and it should be about feeling good, not looking pretty. It's a privilege to see your partner like that.

Jackson: All right. "It is my lady, oh, it is my love, oh, that she knew she wor..."
Odesanya: Why are you reading it like it's a shopping list?
Jackson: Because it makes no sense.
Odesanya: It's poetry. Once you've got the rhythm, the words take on meaning. So, each line has ten syllables, made up of five heartbeats. Ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom, ba-boom. You try.
Jackson: "Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, who is already sick and pale with grief."
Odesanya: So you've got the rhythm and the words. Now you need the emotion... This speech is about love. So, try thinking of someone who makes you feel a lot when you say it.

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #2.2

Eric: Why is Angel Man staring at me like he's plotting my death?
Otis: I don't know.
Eric: French people are intense.

Jean: My name is Dr. Milburn, and I'm here to start an open conversation about S-E-X.
Mr. Hendricks: Uh, sex.
Jean: We adults know that some of you are having sex because when we were your age, some of us were having sex. In fact, many of us still have sex... I'm sure even Headmaster Groff sometimes has sex.

Lily: Just tell him what you want.
Ola: I think it'll freak him out.
Lily: Human boys are so fragile.

Ola: It was really, really bad. He was moving his fingers like he was dialing a 1920s telephone, but really fast, with no rhythm. And then he was kind of, like, jabbing at the same time. And then he kept looking at the clock on his wall like he was timing himself or something.

Otis: It's about making an effort to take little steps to meet her halfway.

Rahim: Only boring people get bored.

Ruthie: Look... there's no magic technique that works with all women. Every orange is different, but you shouldn't be asking me, you should be asking your girlfriend.

Adam: They wanted to get me expelled because they're... poofs. Sir.
Sergeant Morris: Yes. Quite a lot of us are poofs in this institution. But some things are better left unacknowledged...

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #2.1

Otis: It's not normal. Last night I looked at some cheese, and I got an erection.
Eric: What type of cheese?
Otis: Brie. But I swear, it could have been anything!

Otis: The other day, I was riding my bike, and I get a boner out of nowhere. Nothing but trees around me.
Eric: Corduroy trousers?
Otis: Yeah, how did you know?
Eric: Too much friction.

Jean: As a sexual health professional, may I suggest that you look into tailoring your program to give our teenagers the correct tools to be able to free themselves from this unwarranted stigma?
Mr. Groff: And what exactly are those tools?
Jean: The three Ts. Trust. Talking. And truth.

Eric: Okay, so... you know the whole natural organizational skills of my brain thing? Yeah, well, you've got three appointments today, I don't know where, what time, or with who.

Otis: So now I'm wondering whether maybe I've masturbated so much that my penis has run out of erections.

Otis: It is not shameful to have chlamydia, but it's wrong to lie about it... We all have flaws, and our bodies do things we have no control over. But we can always control being truthful.

Otis: You have to be honest with your sexual partners in the future. That's all they're asking for.

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack!

Sex Education #1.8

Sex Education 1×8

Jean: Otis, let's talk about this in a calm and rational way—
Otis: Not calm! Not rational!

Mr. Hendricks: Look, we all have bad days, you know? But in every cloud, there is a rainstorm. No, wait, sorry, that's not right. "There is a rainbow in every cloud," is it?

Mr. Groff: Milburn... A word to the wise. Beware the wild female. They will chew you up and spit you out like stale crisps.

Jean: It wasn't fucking funny when I pushed you out of my vagina, either.

Otis: You say you're all about honesty and clear communication, but you're not honest at all. You inveigle your way into everything I do and then act like it's an accident. You cross multitudes of parental boundaries on a daily basis. You're a... sneaky, sneaky woman!
Jean: That is a vast over-exaggeration!

---

Mr. Groff: Please tell us why you should stay at this school... Nothing? Very well, then...
Maeve: I'm really smart, sir. I'd read all of Jane Austen by the time I was 12. Including her lesser-known work, Lady Susan, which is a severely underrated piece of feminist literature. Um... I can also debate the inherent difference between existentialism and transcendentalism, explaining why Sartre is the prominent voice of the former, and the latter is barely remembered as a philosophical movement. I can also gauge the depths of Mr. Hendricks' personal despair based on his choice of Hawaiian shirt... I'm really smart. I just got unlucky in the family department.

Otis: Can you not shout, okay?
Jean: I wish you weren't so concerned about what your peers thought. You don't want to develop a subservient personality trait.

Otis: Yeah, well, I am all those things, Mum. And... some of it is your fault. A lot of it's Dad's fault, but mostly it's just... it's me. I'm not... I'm not normal.
Jean: Of course you're normal. You're 16! You're not supposed to know the answers to anything. You're going to be just fine.

Otis: Thank you for saying sorry.
Jean: Well, apologizing isn't just social etiquette, it's a hugely important human ritual that brings relationships together and helps people to move forward, and... And you already know all that, don't you?

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #1.7

Otis: Don't you want to live happily ever after?
Maeve: Please. Do I look like I have a Cinderella complex? Are you going?
Otis: It's an appropriated American tradition that celebrates sexism and peddles an unrealistic portrayal of romantic love. So, no.
Maeve: Agreed. Ritualized teenage fun sucks.

Otis: I composed a bunch of texts, and after reading them, I just felt immensely uncool. So, I decided to not text you anything. I'm an idiot, sorry.

Sean: We were born alone and we will die alone so we might as well get what we can along the way. You're welcome.

Eric: Uh... Your nails are fierce.
Rydel: Thanks, kid. Want my advice? Stick to the jewel tones.

Jakob: So... Now I'll fix your sink.

Otis: Fairytales are all about female suppression. You know, Beauty and the Beast, basic Stockholm syndrome. Belle falls in love with a giant beast who's imprisoned her. The Little Mermaid has to lose her voice just to get a boyfriend. Don't get me started on Snow White—
Ola: Right, I'm gonna dance.
Otis: Cool.

Otis: Maeve is not the sort of person who would, you know, date me.
Ola: What does that mean?
Otis: Well, um... Maeve is considerably higher up on the food chain than I am. You know, I'm like a kangaroo or an armadillo. Whereas Maeve's like a panther, or a lion, even.
Ola: So what am I on the food chain?
Otis: You could be like... You know those goats that stand on really steep cliffs and just kind of stick?
Ola: I'm a goat?
Otis: No! I mean, you don't look like a goat. You could be, like, a house cat, if you don't like goats. You know, the skinny ones that just stare at you.
Ola: Okay, I'm a skinny house cat, and she's a lion.
Otis: Oh, no. Maeve is unattainable, and you're...
Ola: You're not a kangaroo, Otis. You're an arsehole.

---

Mr. Effoing: I wanted you to be proud and strong. But you are... so different. It makes me feel scared for you.
Eric: Your fear doesn't help me, Dad. It makes me feel weak.
Mr. Effoing: But why... do you have to be so much?
Eric: This is me.
Mr. Effoing: I don't want you to be hurt.
Eric: Look, I'll be hurt either way. Isn't it better to be who I am?

Mr. Hendricks: And now, a request. This is for all the couples in the room. So, grab yourself a partner. But remember to get consent... Hah! No, seriously. Please do get consent.

Otis: Sometimes, the people we like don't like us back, and it's painful, but there's nothing we can do about it. ... I know what it's like when someone doesn't feel the same way about you. It's... Someone you can't stop thinking about… It hurts. But you can't make people like you.

Liam: I don't like her. I love her.
Otis: I know. But love isn't about grand gestures, or the moon and the stars. It's just dumb luck. And sometimes, you meet someone who feels the same way. And, sometimes, you're unlucky. But one day, you're gonna meet someone who appreciates you for who you are. I mean, there's seven billion people on the planet. I know one of them is gonna climb up on a moon for you.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #1.6

Otis: Mummy... Why was Daddy naked with that lady?

Jean: Do you know what sex is, Otis?... Sex is when a man puts his penis inside a woman's vagina.
Otis: Does it hurt?
Jean: It can. Intercourse can... be wonderful, but it can also cause tremendous pain. And if you're not careful... sex can destroy lives... "Happy Hubert was going to the happy horse festival, ....

Otis: I’m good. Yeah, I'm really good. Great. Just...
Remi: Overcompensation merely masks an unconscious weakness, Otis. Now, come on, talk to your old man.

Maeve: Oh, erm... Maybe don't mention that you're a virgin. Like, obviously, it's totally cool. Not that big of a deal. However, could be really bad for business.

Lily: What is it with boys? It's like you all suddenly woke up with boundaries.

Lily: To be clear, I don't want to have sex with you specifically. Just a human man with a penis.
Otis: That's... great for my self-esteem. I feel the same way. Purely... pragmatic.

Jakob: Jakob: I have two teenage daughters. They used to be angels. And now they are evil. Like demons from Hell. I... I love my girls. Hm? I do, but I don't like them very much.
Jean: Yes, well... middle adolescence is a tumultuous stage of development...
Jakob: So, you dislike your son too?

Miss Sands: Lots of people have acquired knowledge, Maeve. Not many people have ideas. You're an original thinker.

---

Otis: I need a safe word. Flamin... flamingo.

Otis: Er... Whale ambience helps me sleep.
Lily: Did you know that whales only have sex for 35 seconds? Which is odd, actually, because their penises are seven feet long.

Lily: So, exactly how slow are we talkin'?...

Maeve: Go. Where are you gonna go? Texas?
Sean: They have space training in Russia as well, you know, Maeve? I mean, it is a shame about the weather, and the human rights issues, but... actually, very good rockets.

Lily: Okay, this is too slow. I think we can work up to the more intimate stuff. We've been holding hands for 45 minutes. I know how to hold hands. I'm here to fornicate.

Jean: Look, we are obviously physically attracted to one another. I mean, that comes... down to compatible pheromones.
Jakob: Is it?
Jean: Yes. I mean, only about ten percent of men have high enough quantities of androsterone, which is the... pheromone that gives humans what we call sex appeal. I mean, these... These men don't even need to be remotely attractive.
Jakob: But the pheromones...
Jean: Yes, just... send off powerful signals of... attraction.

Otis: Adam thought As You Like It was a song by Jay-Z. And only you could turn the topic of dreams into existential angst.
Maeve: Pessimists outlive optimists.
Otis: We're in for the long haul, then.

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack

Sex Education #1.5

Olivia: I don't know, but it looks like they've got Chewbacca vag.
Ruby: Yeah, if my labia looked like that, I'd, uh, kill myself.

Jackson: Heh. It looked like a guinea pig with a bit of ham on it.

Otis: What's this got to do with therapy?
Maeve: It's a vagina.

Maeve: What would you wear to meet your boyfriend's parents for the first time?
Aimee: Whatever you do, do not dress like you. My brother brought a girl home once. She wore a Nine Inch Nails T-shirt, and my mom thought she worshipped Satan. She did a massive shit in the toilet. My dad had to break it up with a stick. So don't do that, either, 'cause first impressions count. Good luck.

Otis: Why do people send out naked pictures of themselves, anyway?
Maeve: It's a thrill thing. You know, when you do something you're not supposed to, but somehow it makes it better. ... I can see why people do it. It's like not paying for a train ticket. Or finding a lost wallet and keeping the money. You know it's wrong, but it feels good.

Maeve: Have you ever done anything you're not supposed to, Otis?
Otis: Yeah.
Maeve: Like what?
Otis: I... don't-I don't back up my hard drive sometimes, if I'm tired.

Mr. Groff: It... mm... It cannot be all your vaginas.

Ruby: It's my vagina!

--
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtrack