21 дек. 2011 г.

Hung 1x10

A Dick and a Dream or Fight the Honey

& Tanya: What would you think if your house which previously had no flies was suddenly filled with flies?
    Ray: I’d think I had a dead rat under the floorboards.
    Tanya: That’s not helpful. No. The universe is definitely... t’s trying to tell me something.
    Ray: Like what?
    Tanya: Like I’m dead meat, Ray.

& Waiter: Ready to order, Mrs. Egglofy...
    Lenore: Not yet, doll.
    Ray: Mrs. Eggloff?
    Lenore: Oh, that’s my maiden name.
    Ray: Oh, you were married?
    Lenore: No.

& Ray: Honey... Who knows where the bees went?

& Lenore: I think the first thing you’ve got to do is take charge of your pussy. Your vagina is like a car battery, Jessica. You’ve got to keep it charged. If the battery dies, you become weak. And whiny.

& Lenore: How often do you screw your husband?
    Jessica: Um... it varies.
    Lenore: How many times was he inside you last week?
    Jessica: Last week... Zero.


& Lenore: By sex therapist I mean someone who will fuck you so good you don’t care what your husband does or doesn’t do.
    Jessica: You mean like... like... like a professional professional??

& Rhonda: You’ll get to reapply for your jobs next semester. And if you get rehired you’ll keep your former salary but not the benefits...
    Ray: What do you mean, “you”? You mean me?

& Ray: Could things really fall apart even more?

& Tanya: Ray told you that I would give you half my business?
    Lenore: Honestly, this is a great deal for you, Tanya.
    Tanya: Absolutely not!
    Lenore: Be reasonable, T-brain. Ray needs more savvy than your management team can provide. We all bring strengths to the table. For example, I bring a business head. You, Tanya, bring a strong sense of ethics. And Ray brings a big dick. We can be like the three musketeers.

& Tanya: Lenore, Ray is my prostitute!

& Lenore: Look, Tanya... The loser girl never gets the football player in the end. It only happens in the movies.
    Tanya: I don’t understand what you’re saying.
    Lenore: Read my lips: share Ray or no Ray. Got it? Which do you want?

& Mrs. Koontz: I’d heard you found honey in your house and I was wondering, could you... fill up my honey jar? I want to make a carrot cake.

& Mrs. Koontz: You know, Ray, sometimes in life it’s best to forget the big problems and just fuck for a little while.

& Ray: It’ll be okay. Professional kind of like a threesome.
    Tanya: Kind of like a threesome, huh? You ever been in a threesome? Every one I’ve ever been in, the other two people screw while all I do is bring them water.

& Tanya: Don’t you want to bring happiness into the world? At least on some level?
    Ray: Sure, Tanya. But right now, I’ll settle for a living.

& Lenore: Welcome to the majors, Ray. Okay, this one is a natural blonde with a great body and a lousy life. She hasn’t had a good lay in ages. She’s a little nervous, but I think it’s gonna be okay. Just do your thing.

& Ray: There are moments in your life when you realize God is joking. He’s up there... Hell, maybe she’s up there... laughing her head off.

& Jessica: Why are you saying all this, Ray?
    Ray: I don’t know. Sometimes it’s good to tell people the truth. You know? Someone you’ve known for a long time.

& Ray: I used to have a family. I used to have a wife, kids, a house, a job. Now, well... now I had my dick... a dick and a dream. If that’s not the American way, what is?

--
On Imdb.

The End of Season 1

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