A Landmark Story

Elementary 1×21

& Holmes: Mr. Moran, your claims about Moriarty cannot be substantiated and are of no interest. Now, I was told you had some information about some other of your victims.
Sebastian Moran: And I was told, every year about Christmas time, a fat, jolly old man delivers toffees to good little girls and boys. Now, I waited up for him one night to steal his stash... but he didn’t show.

& Watson: So you prove you’re reasonable by asking me to commit a felony...
    Holmes: Security in mortuaries is so lax you can hardly call it breaking and entering.

& Holmes: We’ll have to proceed.
    Watson: Seriously?
    Holmes: Mm.
    Watson: But what happens when people figure out that somebody came in here and cut up a body in the middle of the night?
    Holmes: We’ll sew him back up again, won’t we? ... Anyway, they’re certainly not gonna assume two people broke in in the middle of the night and performed an illicit autopsy, are they?
    Watson: Right, because that would be crazy.

& Watson: Just give it to me!
    Holmes: Mm... Mm... Oh, that’s lovely. You really are quite skilled, Watson.
    Watson: No. I am dissecting a body in the middle of the night. We are not having a moment.

& Watson: What’s with the big band music?
    Holmes: I was thinking about bootleg alcohol this morning. Reminded me I haven’t listened to Bix Beiderbecke in quite some time.
    Watson: And the doll being burned at the stake?
    Holmes: I’m in a dispute with a theologist about Galileo.

& Holmes: Untraceable shell corporation, a scheme to make millions by revoking the landmark status of an old building, and murder by home appliance. We’re obviously pursuing a lively intellect.

& Watson: And how do we catch our current quarry?
    Holmes: First, I’m gonna clean up the air conditioner. Then it’s quite obvious what we need to do. We need to plan a murder.

& Holmes: If I was a sociopath, and I wanted to stop anyone from taking too close a look at my murderous transaction, I would remove Ms. Taggart from the chessboard.
    Watson: But we need to warn her.
    Holmes: We’ll do no such thing. Our mission is to study this woman to observe her in her natural habitat. No, the best way to keep this woman safe is to find out how to kill her.

& Sherlock: A moment ago, I could have sworn I saw an Africanized honeybee.
    Watson: How do you “Africanize” something?
    Sherlock: It’s a term to describe a particularly aggressive species. It’s odd to... Odd to see them here. They’re not native to New York.

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& Sherlock: Since then, we’ve entered into a partnership. It’s an arrangement which I find very rewarding. You’re an interesting project, and I-I enjoy watching your progress. The thing that’s different about me, empirically speaking... is you.
    Watson: .... That is one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.
    Sherlock: .... As I said, it’s an empirical observation.

& Sherlock: Do you want some tea?
    Watson: No, I want a drink.
    Sherlock: !.!.!.!
    Watson: Sorry.

& John Douglas: You want to know about Irene. I didn’t kill her. But I know what happened. I could tell you why she had to die. It was because of you, Holmes.

& Watson: That’s my old medical bag... Legos?
    Sherlock: Yean, the bag needed a certain heft if it was gonna fool John Douglas.

& Sherlock: 10:17. Thank you. Watson, you know... some people... without possessing genius... have a remarkable knack for stimulating it.
    Watson: Oh, an insult and a boast.

& Watson: You couldn’t have known...
    Sherlock: Yeah, you know, that’s what idiots tell themselves when they’ve been outsmarted.

& Sherlock: I don’t know what his game is.
    Watson: It seems like maybe you’re the game.

& Moriarty: My name is Moriarty. I believe we’re overdue for a chat.

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