Bad Moms (2016)

Carla: Do you know what I hate? There are so many fuckin' rules now... "Don't punish your kids." "Don't say no to your kids." "Go to your kid's baseball games." "Tell your kids you love 'em." "Don't fuck the janitor at your kid's school..." I mean, what the fuck is this? Russia?
Amy: We're killing ourselves, trying to be perfect, and it's making us insane. In this day and age, it's impossible to be a good mom.

Jane: Aren't you gonna make us breakfast?
Amy: Oh. No.
Jane: But what are we gonna eat?
Amy: You guys are really smart. You can make your own breakfast.

Jessie: What is it with you moms? I am a middle school soccer coach. All I wanna do is make enough money to feed my cats and fill my fuckin' Prius.

Dale: I'm firing you.
Amy: Why?
Dale: Well, you quit coming to the office.
Amy: Okay, maybe I've been slacking off a little bit, but... Tessa took two weeks off when Jon Snow died on Game of Thrones, and he's not even a real person.
Dale: To be fair, we all took two weeks off when Jon Snow died. You're the only person that didn't take two weeks off.

Carla: It's because we love our kids. It's because we love our stupid, selfish, ungrateful, little shit-faces! That's why. We love 'em so much that we would do... Literally anything for them.

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