Moone Boy 1x1

Men of the Houses

& Sean Murphy: Ever wanted to be the imaginary friend of an idiot boy in the West of Ireland?.. Me neither. But there you go. Allow me to introduce Martin Paul Kenny Dalglish Moone.

& Sean: Remember, tomorrow’s your big day. Things get way easier when you turn 12.
    Martin Moone: Yeah, the big one-two.
    Sean: That’s right. I bet they’re right in there. Planning out your party as we speak...
    Martin: I’m home! Better hide my presents!
    Sinead Moone: Mam says you were a mistake.
    Sean: Not a mistake... not a mistake! An accident!

& Martin: This better be vouchers, Fidelma.
    Fidelma Moone: It is. Sort of.
    Martin: “I owe you one present. Love, Fidelma.”

& Sean: No! Surely they haven’t got you something decent? It must be a bicycle-shaped sock. Or a bicycle-shaped toilet brush. Or a bicycle-shaped kick in the arse.
    Martin: Wow, a bicycle-shaped bicycle!

& Gerry Bonner: God, I hate my kids...
    Liam Moone: I’m not too crazy about my own.
    Gerry: They’re awful aren’t they? Children. I mean here we are. Two decent fellas full of compassion and willingness to love and what do we get in return?
    Liam: Hassle*!
    Gerry: Hassle!

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& Gerry: Is that a hammer in your pocket?.. Let me guess. You were planning to beat me to death with it, weren’t you?
    Liam: I was indeed.
    Gerry: Bloody kids! Did I say tea? I meant gin.

& Declan Mannion: Protection’s a service I provide. It’s gonna cost you though.
    Martin: Cost me what, roughly?
    Declan: A feel of your sister’s boobs.
    Martin: I’m sorry, what was that?
    Declan: A feel of your sister’s boobs.
    Sean: Should have gone with rabid dog.
    Declan: Take it or leave it, Marty.

& Martin: Hey Trish! Made you a cuppa. Tea. ... Wow, that’s a cool... whatever it is. Anyhoo, I was wondering if you might do me a wee favour...
    Trisha Moone: Probably not. What do you want?
    Martin: Well. Silly thing. You know the way you have boobs...?

& Liam: Well, lads, I’ve got to say that this little gathering has been very... cathartic. But I have to admit something here. I don’t know how to say this, but...
    Frank: Go on, Liam. Be Dad, not sad.
    Liam: I don’t actually know how to play poker.
    Gerry: Worry not, Liam. None of us do.

& Martin: Stop! I’m too busy to fight you right now but I’ll fight you tonight outside the cinema.
    Jonner Bonner: It’s a date, Moone.
    Conner Bonner: But not in a gay way.

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Hassle — стычка, перебранка, драка, ссора, склока

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