Nothing Lasts Forever

Lucifer 5×14

Chloe: Wait, you're gonna be what?
Lucifer: The new God. Isn't that great?

Lucifer: I would be a much better God than my father ever was.
Chloe: No, but why would you even want to be God?
Lucifer: Never mind the why. This is gonna be great, Detective. Lots of changes when I'm in charge. War eradicated, world hunger satiated. Hangovers... never should have existed in the first place.

Lucifer: In fact, things will only get better. I'll become omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent. All the omnis.

Lucifer: Look, Detective, this is a good thing. Trust me...

Lucifer: Well, in the meantime, how about business as usual? Nice little murder, take your mind off things?

Ella: Could you imagine being ripped apart by a shark?
Dan: Do I have to?

Ella: What do you think the worst part would be? Those big ole teeth tearing into your skin, the water filling your lungs as you screamor the heart attack from the sheer terror of it all?

Lucifer: Sharks, one of Earth's most misunderstood creatures... Definitely correcting that when I'm God.

Lucifer: Uh, Detective, I just realized, when I'm God, I'll know the answers to all your questions! No more asking useless people like Lizzie here.

Amenadiel: Can we please talk about the immediate problem here? Like all of us archangels gathered here on Earth, out in the open for all of humanity to see!
Lucifer: Relax, brother, this is LA. No one will even notice.

God: Children, children, please, one thing at a time. My retirement plan, then my successor. But first... who wants another hot dog?

Mazikeen: Having a soul is the worst.
Linda: But isn't that what you wanted?
Mazikeen: Yeah, until I got one.

Mazikeen: Turns out having a soul mate that can die... It's torture.

Linda: But wasn't there a time that all you wanted was to go back there?
Mazikeen: Yeah, as Hell's torturer. But with a soul, if I die, I'll turn up as one of the tortured.... Oh, God. I know how they're gonna torture me!.. I've gotta go fix this.

Penelope: And your name is?
God: You can call me God--
Chloe: Frey! Godfrey is his name.

God: Children. They blame us for everything.
Penelope: Right? As if we created the world!

Mazikeen: I know what my Hell loop is going to be. I was trying to change it.
Amenadiel: So you'd rather be a puppy murderer?

Lucifer: How'd it go? Ready to ride off into the sunset with a Decker of your own?
God: Penelope is lovely. But she's a few millennia too young for me.
Lucifer: Right. Okay. No double Decker.

Lucifer: To Mazikeen. Queen of Hell.
Mazikeen: I was thinking Maziqueen. But whatever.

Dan: What are you worried about then?
Chloe: That he won't be able to balance being the ruler of the universe with being my boyfriend. Which, when I say out loud, sounds selfish...

God: I thought you wanted to be God.
Lucifer: Well, I did. I... I do. But you've only just got here. Can't you... stay and annoy me for a bit longer?
God: Nothing lasts forever, son.

Amenadiel: Dad, wait. You forgot to name your successor.
God: It's not up to me anymore. You'll figure it out.
Lucifer: Back to your mysterious ways already.
God: All part of my plan...
Lucifer: Plan. How much of this was your plan?
God: Goodbye, my loves...

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