House M.D. 8x4

Risky Business

& House: This would totally suck.

& Park: 100 bucks says I won’t get fired.
    House: Oh, you don’t wanna bet me. ... Oh, my. You’re fired.
    Park: I... the bet is...
    House: But I thought...
    Park: After...
    House: ...then...
    Park: ...I... oh...
    House: ...if only...
    Park: The bet’s that I’ll get fired after my hearing!

& House: You’re already a C-note in the hole.

& House: You’re late.
    Adams: Considering I don’t work here, arguably, I’m early.

& Adams: Thad Barton? We only help rich white guys?
    House: I am an equal opportunity exploiter. I only help those who can help myself. I have a department to re-fund.

& Park: Thyrotoxicosis?
    House: Not... a terrible idea. I’m gonna go give him P.T.U. and T.L.C. I have no idea what that second one stands for.

& House: It’s called Alice in Wonderland syndrome.
    Thad Barton’s daughter: Seriously?
    House: I never joke.

& House: Oh, you guys are gonna love Doctors Chase and Taub. Keep your Nazi sentiments quiet around the little one.

& House: I claim this burger in the name of Queen Isabella of Spain.
    Adams: I’ll go check on the patient. I have Hepatitis C.
    Park: ... She got it from me.

---

& Foreman: What are you doing?
    House: Holding your ass.

& House: Loyalty to real estate is stupid, because loyalty is stupid.
    Adams: First patriotism, now loyalty. You hate ice cream too?
    House: French vanilla, yeah.

& Park: He’s been acting like he’s actually trying to get me fired.
    Wilson: That’s because he is actually trying to get you fired.
    Park: Does he hate me?
    Wilson: Not sure that’s relevant to the equation.
    Park: So it’s really over $100?
    Wilson: Not sure the amount is relevant. He’s fighting for his honor.
    Park: He’ll ruin my career.
    Wilson: Not sure that’s...
    Park: What if I bet him $200 I will get fired.
    Wilson: He sees competing debts with the same person as a disgrace to the game. He’ll be even more motivated to beat you.
    Park: ... If you were me, what would you do?
    Wilson: You have to give him something he values more than honor. And you should update your resume.

& House: You were late the other day ’cause you were having breakfast with grammy Adams or cousin Itt. And she was nagging you about finding a husband.
    Adams: All right, this is getting annoying. I’ll just tell you what I was...
    House: Ah, ah, ah, ah! No spoilers. They ruin everything.

& Park: You owe me 106,804 won! Or $100 U.S.
    House: God, but you’re petty*.

& Thud: I’m thirsty.
    House: That’s a side effect of not dying.

& House: Call Chase and Taub. Get ’em in here. The boys are back.

--
petty — мелкий; мелочный; незначительный; ограниченный

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