1 февр. 2012 г.

House M.D. 8x10

Runaways

& House: How long has your daughter had trouble breathing?
    HOBO: About a week now.
    House: The best dads wait two or more.

& Callie: It’s not like it’s serious. I-I checked online, and it’s... Asthma or something.
    House: “Or something” is the number one killer of teens with no medical degree.

& Callie: So about the inhaler for my asthma...
    House: Sorry! Hospital policy specifically prohibits me from giving meds to unrelated homeless people pretending to be father and daughter. Your pants are a size too short, so either you grew a couple of inches or you grabbed the closest size in a thrift store. And only you have dimples*, which are adorable, but they’re also an X-linked dominant genetic trait.

& House: Someone been using your head as a soccer ball?
    Callie: No.
    House: Much as I’d like to take your word for it, I have no interest in taking your word for it.

& House: Pay the man. He’s late for a trashcan fire.

& Callie: Would you tell me what’s going on? What’s wrong with me?
    House: I have no idea.


& Taub: Why’d you ask to meet us 30 miles away from the hospital?
    House: Because I can. Also, Chris Christie’s blog says the pancakes here are the best.

& ’Confederacy Private’: Hello, good sir. My brother, the General here, gots the green-apple quickstep.
    House: ..... One of us is in the wrong time zone. And if it’s me, I need to talk to a stockbroker and anyone from the Kennedy family, in that order.

& ’General’: Sir, are you questioning my resolve?
    House: Yes, and your sanity. I’m multitasking.

& House: I could add some Mercury, if you want to make it more authentic.
    ’General’: The Confederacy thanks you, Doc.

& Chase: You could probably just hide the porn in your underwear drawer...
    Taub: Magazines go away so I won’t ignore my children. I know I have to pay attention to them. I want to pay attention to them, but they’re just so... Boring.

& Adams: What happened to the social worker I called?
    Foreman: Apparently, someone identifying themselves as Dr. Pujols called and said the patient ran off.
    House: Come on. “Poo holes.”

& Foreman: I’m not gonna let you blackmail me, House.
    House: Oh, of course not. There’s no way someone of your integrity would let me compromise your job in any major way over some tawdry* bit of gossip. But what about compromising it in a minor way?.. Reduced clinic hours... Unlimited Internet porn budget... That makes much more sense than the nuclear option of ruining both our lives. You can keep these. I got copies.

& Taub: The sound I make is, moooo! The sound I make is, quack quack quack quack quack.
    Sophie & Sophia: ...............

& Taub: I’m an ass. On the plus side, I can now program my DVR from my phone.

& House: Go!
    Park: You bet 100 bucks on a turtle race?!
    House: I paid Mr. Chips 5 bucks to take a dive.

& Chase: People never lie about people they hate.

& Adams: Do you think people can change?
    Chase: No. But I don’t think that’s gonna change your opinion, because... people don’t change.

& Ellen Rogers, Callie’s mother: You must be Dr. House..?
    House: I save my appearances for when parents are on the brink of doing something incredibly stupid.

& Chase: Peek-a-boo! Peek-a-boo!
    Taub: How do you keep doing the same thing over and over with the same level of enthusiasm?
    Chase: First off, be a decent, empathetic person.

& Taub: Your patients love you because you’re empathetic!
    Wilson: .... I also have kind eyes. Why are you here?

& Wilson: It’s all about common ground. You found one thing you both like or hate. John Woo movies, romance novels, kale*... Sometimes, the best way to connect with someone is stop thinking about them and focus on yourself.
    Taub: Wh—uhh.
    Wilson: What is this about?
    Taub: Not everything has an agenda. See ya.

& Ellen: Do you know what’s wrong with her?
    House: Family vacations kill.

& Foreman: I’m not like you, House.
    House: True... No limp.

Foy Vance - Be The Song

--
dimple — ямочка
tawdry — мишурный; кричаще безвкусный
kale — овощной суп; суп из капусты

On the Imdb.

C also Tumbler Moments @ housedailydose.

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