The Retraction Reaction

The Big Bang Theory 11×2

Sheldon: Only three? Good gravy, how many babies are in there?

Leonard: What? You got something to say?
Sheldon: I think I just said it. P-F-F. Pff!

Leonard: You want me to lie.
Mrs. Davis: Look, Dr. Hofstadter, I'm counting on you. I think that you are the smartest physicist at this university.
Leonard: Really?
Mrs. Davis: See? Lies. They're not that hard.

Amy: Huh. Looks like you've been busy.
Sheldon: Oh, I have. Uh, dark matter, uh, reconciling gravity and quantum mechanics... Supersymmetry. I've figured out the biggest problems in physics today.
Amy: Wow, you solved them all?
Sheldon: No, I just, I figured out that they're the biggest problems.

Sheldon: Well, on the bright side, after working together for 15 years, you finally get to hear me say, "You were right."

Sheldon: Read it back to me?
Leonard: "Yes, one might question the $20 billion to build and run the Large Hadron Collider, but on the other hand..."
Sheldon: Okay. Um... Oh, oh! "On the other hand, contrary to predictions, the collider didn't create a small black hole that devoured the Earth and life as we know it. So, s-- money well spent."

Amy: ... That's great. I-I don't have assistants.
Bernadette: Oh. I guess that's one of the benefits of being in the private sector... That and all the money I make.
Amy: Yeah, you've got that. I've got my integrity. Hard to say which is better without making you feel bad.

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Leonard: No, we don't need to be cheered up. It just turns out that physics is exactly like Lost. Started out great, and turns out just a big old waste of time.

Howard: Oh, my God, I'm gonna have two babies.

Sheldon: Penny, Richard Feynman is an iconic phys...
Penny: I know who he is. Leonard dressed as him for Halloween last year.

Feynman was so cool. When I was a kid, I'd put on some headphones and crank up one of his lectures and just... jam out to knowledge.
Howard: This guy knew how to live. He taught himself musical instruments. He studied Portuguese. Just to give a speech in Brazil.

Leonard: I sent you an e-mail?
Mrs. Davis: You bet you did. "Hello. Shalom and aloha from the grave of Richard Feynman..."

Mrs. Davis: "I know I said physics is dead,
but it is the opposite of dead. If anything, it is undead, like a zombie. Speaking of which, if Richard Feynman came back as a zombie, I would totally let him bite me--"
Leonard: Any chance that's the end?

Mrs. Davis: "In conclusion, physics is great, squirrels suck, and someday, I'm gonna put my mom in a cheap nursing home. Yours truly, XOXO, Dr. Leonard Hofstadter."
Leonard: I-I can explain. I...
Mrs. Davis: "P.S. Can you come pick us up? The Uber driver won't open the door because Sheldon is covered in blue vomit."

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+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Vanity Card # 563!