Mid-way to Mid-town

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel 2×2

Midge: Anyhow, some rules you need to follow. Rule number one: no eating in the living room. Rule number two: touch nothing pink. Rule number three... Rule number 38: do not touch Papa's robe!

Susie: Eighteen and a half... Such a tiny fucking thigh.

Susie: I'm sorry. I'm having a little trouble focusing here right now. I'm very high, and there's just a lot of words coming from a little, yellow light source, and it's freaking me out. It feels like a flower's yelling at me.

Susie: A gig. A real gig. A paying gig. No passing the hat. A club with booze and everything.
Midge: Midtown? A midtown gig?
Susie: Almost. 15th Street.
Midge: Wow. Midway to midtown.

Susie: Money is my main goal. I don't have any, and I'd like some.

Abe: The Bible serves its purpose. It is basically a moral set of rules. A... a road map. Men are not able to determine right or wrong without a road map.

Rose: Let me guess. Freud?
Abe: Better. The Bible.

Abe: We spent two hours debating moral nihilism versus mereological or compositional nihilism. At least, I think that's what we were debating. I can't be sure. Either way, it's nihilism, so who cares?

Rose: Bonne nuit, mon amour.
Abe: Bonne nuit, mon amour.
Rose: You're a wonderful man.
Abe: You're a terrible cook.

Joel: Let me guess, it's worse than I thought.
Mrs. Moskowitz: Oh, much, much worse. None of these numbers add up. A... and this writing. At first, I thought it was in Hebrew, but then I realized parts are in Yiddish. And this is ancient Aramaic, which has been a dead language for 2,000 years.

Mrs. Moskowitz: I think it's a numerical system that has eliminated the number six.

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Shirley: What do you want to know?
Mrs. Moskowitz: Well, everything would be nice.
Shirley: This column is the money we have. This column is the money we will have as soon as these people from this column or that column pay us. Unless it has a bagel stamp, which means it's still being negotiated but we started the work anyway in case it works out. Three flags, that means the check cleared. Two flowers, that means a half and half.
Mrs. Moskowitz: A half and half?
Shirley: Half check, half cash. Or half cash, half services. Or half... something and half something else.

Mrs. Moskowitz: Uh, can I just ask you... um, there is a Sunny spelled with a "U" and a Sonny with an "O" and another with an I-E. Is that the same Sonny?
Shirley: Of course it's the same Sonny. It's Sonny. Sonny from Queens.

Shirley: This is a foolproof system that I invented myself. Completely secure. Only I can understand it... I don't know.

Shirley: Oh, well, we know when the loans are due. A couple of guys break in in the middle of the night. They bust up some chairs and windows. And that's when we know the loan is due.

Midge: Smell that?
Susie: Smells like cheap beer and piss.
Midge: I know. Exciting, right?

Midge: So, going fifth is better 'cause...?
Susie: The audience is drunker? Lowers the bar...

Joel: Remember, it's not permanent.

Midge: Tits up.
Susie: Arms down.

Midge: All comics are comics 'cause something in their lives went horribly wrong. Something went to shit...

Midge: Now, think about this. Comedy is fueled by oppression, by the lack of power, by sadness and disappointment, by abandonment and humiliation... Now, who the hell does that describe more than women? Judging by those standards, only women should be funny. And Stan.

Abe: Zelda... What can you make that's French?
Zelda: Nothing.
Abe: What can you make that we can say is French, isn't, but he'll never know?
Zelda: Goulash.
Abe: Perfect!

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