Best Self

The Good Place 2×9

Eleanor: Okay. I don't know about you guys, but I say we leave this miserable shirthole.

Tahani: Although I believe I've asked you this question already...
Michael: There is no business class.

Jason: So many memories of this place... Eating frozen yogurt, and then having diarrhea, and then eating more frozen yogurt, and then more diarrhea. Maybe I should've realized this wasn't the Good Place 'cause of all the diarrhea.
Chidi: Maybe you shouldn't be eating all of that frozen yogurt right now.

Eleanor: I am definitely the best version of myself. I know a shirt-ton about ethics now, 'cause I studied. And I read books that weren't even written by the Real Housewives.

Michael: ...and you had your first kiss, which: Gross. Kissing is gross. You just mash your food holes together. It's not for that.

Michael: Oh man. This stinks. I'm having this feeling where... what is it called? You know, where you... you did a thing and you're sad after it? After-sad? Is that... no. You humans have so many emotions! You only need two: Anger and confusion!

Chidi: Here's the thing about me... You know the sound that a fork makes in the garbage disposal? That's the sound that my brain makes all the time. It's just this constant grinding about things I'm afraid of or things that I want or want to want or want to want to...
Eleanor: Is it grinding in there right now, bud?

Eleanor: Michael... is easily the best version of himself. Granted, the bar was low. He is a demon. But he made a mistake and admitted he was wrong, which makes him better than 90% of all humans.

Eleanor: Are you okay with leaving the fake Good Place behind?
Michael: As long as I'm with you guys, I'm always in the fake Good Place.
Eleanor: That doesn't sound as nice as you think it does.
Michael: The real Bad Place was the friends we made along the way.
Eleanor: Nope. Still nonsense. One more try.
Michael: In a way, the Good Place was inside the Bad Place all along?
Eleanor: You know what? That's technically true.

Michael: Hit it, Janet! Next stop, the actual Bad Place!

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