& Dracula: Honey, your gramps would not have been cool with this. He’s old-school. ... He’s not as enlightened as your hip Daddy.
& Mavis: So, you’re really okay with him not being a monster?
Dracula: Human, monster, unicorn, as long as you’re happy.
& Dracula: I would eat a bucket of garlic to fly with you.
& Mavis:I love you, Dad, but we don’t even know if the kid’s gonna be a vampire. I’d be thrilled if the baby’s human-y, just like Johnny.
Dracula: «Human-y.» With thousands of years of Dracula genes. Not gonna happen.
Mavis: As long as the baby’s healthy.
Dracula: Of course. A healthy little vampire.
Mavis: Or human.
Dracula: Yes, a human who can fly as a bat.
& Johnny: Yeah, got it. Maybe you should just get Bluetooth.
Dracula: Okay. Blue Tooth, come over here. So, now what?
& Dracula: Rise and shine, my Denisovich.
& Dennis: Hi, Papa.
Dracula: Hello, my little devil. Did you have sweet nightmares?
& Dracula: Denisovich. Take a breath. You can really turn into a bat. Try. Feel the bat... Not a chicken.
& Mavis: And you remember how to video chat?
Dracula: Yes, yes. With the phone and the buttons and the agony.
& Dracula: It’s the vampire summer camp I went to as a kid.
Griffin: What’s it, Camp Vamp?
Dracula: No. Who names their camp «Camp Vamp?» It’s Camp Winnepacaca.
& Frankenstein: He’s still not flying.
Dracula: He will.
Wayne: Still not.
Dracula: It’ll happen.
Frankenstein: This is a tall tower.
Dracula: That’s why it’s good.
Murray: You-You should get him.
Wayne: He’s gonna fall to his death.
Dracula: He’s taking his time.
& Mavis: Maybe you’ve let humans into your hotel, Dad. But I don’t think you’ve let them into your heart.
& Vlad: Bela, shut your blood hole. Look what you started.
& Vlad: These two smell funny.
Linda: Oh, you’re European. It’s called deodorant.
Mike: Nothing like insulting an entire continent, Linda.
& Vlad: You! You let your daughter marry a human and have a human kid? Why don’t you just put a stake through my heart.
& Vlad: I am holding you hostage. And me and my crew are gonna tear that human-hugging hotel to shreds.
Dennis: You can’t.
Vlad: Really? Why not?
Dennis: Cebause...
Vlad: Cebause, why?
Dennis: Cebause it will make Papa Drac sad.
--
+ quotes on the IMDb
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