22 нояб. 2013 г.

The Thanksgiving Decoupling

The Big Bang Theory 7×9

& Raj: It’s horrible. Why would you push a cow over? They’re sacred!
    Penny: Oh, stop it. I’ve seen you eat, like, a million hamburgers.
    Raj: Hey, an animal can be both sacred and delicious.

& Leonard: Were you drunk?
    Penny: I was 16 in Nebraska. What do you think?

& Sheldon: You know, I’ve been told that a bald refusal of an invitation is rude and one must instead offer up a polite excuse, so... I’d love to go, but, unfortunately, that sounds awful.

& Leonard: It’d actually be nice to not hear Sheldon complain about my cooking all day.
    Sheldon: Yo... uh, excuse me, but every year you prepare a terrible meal and every year I criticize it. Do our traditions mean nothing to you?

& Sheldon: Now I know how the African slaves felt. Being dragged from their homes to labor under the yoke of the white man...
    Amy: Are you honestly comparing Thanksgiving dinner at Wolowitz’s mom’s with one of the greatest tragedies in the history of mankind?
    Sheldon: Yes.

& Bernadette: Hi, Dad... Oh, you brought beer for everybody.
    Mr. Rostenkowski: Uh, oh, okay, yeah, it’s for everybody.

& Howard: Her gout’s flaring up. Turns out an apple pie a day does not keep the doctor away.

& Amy: No traffic, we’re sailing.
    Sheldon: Yes. Like we’re on a ship. Coming from Africa to America.
    Amy: Sheldon, that’s completely inappropriate. You can’t keep comparing yourself to a slave.
    Sheldon: Yes, Miss Amy.

& Bernadette: Thanks for saving the day.
    Raj: Ah, no problem. It wouldn’t be Thanksgiving without an Indian providing the food.


& Bernadette: Why don’t you go keep my dad company?
    Howard: Oh, he doesn’t want me in there. I’m the creepy little guy who has sex with his daughter.

& Howard: What’s with you?
    Leonard: Oh, she’s mad at me because she just found out she’s married to Zack.

& Amy: Did you guys know Penny married Zack three years ago?

& Sheldon: Now, I don’t know the first thing about women, but I would not follow her.

& Leonard: How am I the bad guy? She’s the one who married someone else. I’m the victim.
    Howard: Sounds like Zack’s the victim. You’re sleeping with his wife.

& Mr. Rostenkowski: I’ve kept my marriage together for 35 years. Can I weigh in here?
    Leonard: Sure.
    Mr. Rostenkowski: I’m trying to watch the game. Shut up!

& Mr. Rostenkowski: How the hell do you know that?
    Sheldon: My father loved football. He always made me watch it before I was allowed to do my homework.

& Sheldon: I don’t care for your mother’s bathroom. There’s not an angle to do one’s business without a clown figurine staring at you.
    Howard: That’s why I sit.
    Mr. Rostenkowski: Yeah, that’s why.

& Howard: Anyone need a beer?
    Mr. Rostenkowski: Yeah!
    Howard: Thank God.

& Amy: I can’t believe Penny’s married to Zack. Wonder what she saw in that guy.
    Bernadette: I don’t know. He’s sweet, he’s tall, handsome. Broad shoulders, good hair.
    Raj: Hmm. Wonder what she sees in Leonard.

& Leonard: Sorry she made you come over here on a holiday.
    Zack: It’s all right. I didn’t have anything going on. Plus, Penny told me we’re married, and Thanksgiving’s a time to be with family.

& Zack: I just think splitting up can be rough on kids.
    Penny: We don’t have any kids!
    Zack: Are you sure? ’Cause you didn’t know we were married until this morning.

& Zack: Not cool, bro. I’m starting to think you’re not the kind of guy I want dating my wife.

& Zack: Know what they say: “Happy wife, happy life.” Let’s eat.

& Sheldon: ’Two, three, eight, four, six.’ That’s all I can do without throwing up.
    Mr. Rostenkowski: That is not what I expected when you said you were gonna burp “pie.”
    Mrs. Wolowitz: Did somebody say “pie”?!!!

& Bernadette: Hey. Howie says you’ve been making fun of him all day! Now, both of you apologize right now!
    Sheldon: She’s so tiny... It’s funny when she’s mad.

& Penny: Hey, honey, I’m sorry about today. And I promise, next time I get married, it won’t be a joke. It’ll be for love. Or money.

--
On the IMDb

Σ Very good one.

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