& Mindy: A handgun bullet travels at more than 700 miles per hour...
& Dave: Me? I’ve given up being a superhero ’cause it was way too dangerous. The only problem? I was dying of boredom.
& Dave: ’Like most high school seniors, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Hell, I didn’t know what channel I wanted to watch!’
Marty: It’s just TV, Dave, not peace in the Middle East.
& Mindy: Hit me.
Dave: You’re a fifteen-year-old girl--- What the hell?!
Mindy: Act like a bitch, get slapped like a bitch.
& Mindy: If you’re scared of dying, one thing is certain. You are going to die.
& — You ready to die, faggot?
Mindy: You know, all the homophobic shit makes you sound super gay?
& Chris: Red Mist was my superhero name. Henceforth, I’ll be known as... The Motherfucker.
& Dave: This is the single greatest thing I’ve ever seen.
& Brooke: That is who you are, Mindy. You may not dress like us, or talk like us, but when it comes to boys, we’re all the same. Twilight, Channing Tatum, Union J. It’s biology, bitch. Don’t fight it.
& Insect Man: I’ve been bullied my whole life for being gay. So, now I stand up for the defenseless. That’s why I don’t wear a mask. Too much like being back in the closet.
Colonel Stars and Stripes: Long as your heart is in the right place, we don’t care what you put in your mouth.
& Colonel Stars and Stripes: Insect Man, I want you right behind me. Everybody else, spread out, catch some strays. And try to have fun. Otherwise, what’s the point?
& The Motherfucker: You’re saying you hired a chick?
Javier: Yeah. Former KGB. She was locked up in the gulag until she ate her cellmate.
The Motherfucker: “Mother Russia”.
Javier: Mother Russia and Motherfucker both on the same team? That doesn’t work, Chris.
The Motherfucker: I am not asking for suggestions, asshole. Just get them costumes and get them ready.
& Mindy: Don’t worry about me. I can kill a man with his own finger.
& Brooke: You get away from me. Please. You win.
Mindy: I don’t want to win. I just want to make the world a better place.
& Dave: I think it’s time to get back to the real world.
Night Bitch: I thought we were trying to make it a better place.
Dave: Then why is it worse?
& Mindy: Game on, cocksuckers!
& The Motherfucker: What is the point of wearing a mask if you can’t do what you want?
Dave: I wanted to do good.
The Motherfucker: No, people want to win the lottery. People want to fuck Scarlett Johansson.
& Dave: What is wrong with you, dude? This is not a comic book, it’s real-life! When you’re dead, it’s done! There’s no sequel.
The Motherfucker: You made this real. You started it! Now I’m gonna finish it. I’ll be immortal, like an evil Jesus.
& Mindy: You don’t have to be a badass to be a superhero, Dave. You just have to be brave.
& Dave: What was that?
Mindy: That was my first kiss. Be nice or I’ll rip your ass out through your mouth.
& Dave: Superheroes can’t exist in the real world for a reason. It’s because the real world, needs real heroes.
--
+ quotes on the IMDb
& Dave: Me? I’ve given up being a superhero ’cause it was way too dangerous. The only problem? I was dying of boredom.
& Dave: ’Like most high school seniors, I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life. Hell, I didn’t know what channel I wanted to watch!’
Marty: It’s just TV, Dave, not peace in the Middle East.
& Mindy: Hit me.
Dave: You’re a fifteen-year-old girl--- What the hell?!
Mindy: Act like a bitch, get slapped like a bitch.
& Mindy: If you’re scared of dying, one thing is certain. You are going to die.
& — You ready to die, faggot?
Mindy: You know, all the homophobic shit makes you sound super gay?
& Chris: Red Mist was my superhero name. Henceforth, I’ll be known as... The Motherfucker.
& Dave: This is the single greatest thing I’ve ever seen.
& Brooke: That is who you are, Mindy. You may not dress like us, or talk like us, but when it comes to boys, we’re all the same. Twilight, Channing Tatum, Union J. It’s biology, bitch. Don’t fight it.
& Insect Man: I’ve been bullied my whole life for being gay. So, now I stand up for the defenseless. That’s why I don’t wear a mask. Too much like being back in the closet.
Colonel Stars and Stripes: Long as your heart is in the right place, we don’t care what you put in your mouth.
& Colonel Stars and Stripes: Insect Man, I want you right behind me. Everybody else, spread out, catch some strays. And try to have fun. Otherwise, what’s the point?
& The Motherfucker: You’re saying you hired a chick?
Javier: Yeah. Former KGB. She was locked up in the gulag until she ate her cellmate.
The Motherfucker: “Mother Russia”.
Javier: Mother Russia and Motherfucker both on the same team? That doesn’t work, Chris.
The Motherfucker: I am not asking for suggestions, asshole. Just get them costumes and get them ready.
& Mindy: Don’t worry about me. I can kill a man with his own finger.
& Brooke: You get away from me. Please. You win.
Mindy: I don’t want to win. I just want to make the world a better place.
& Dave: I think it’s time to get back to the real world.
Night Bitch: I thought we were trying to make it a better place.
Dave: Then why is it worse?
& Mindy: Game on, cocksuckers!
& The Motherfucker: What is the point of wearing a mask if you can’t do what you want?
Dave: I wanted to do good.
The Motherfucker: No, people want to win the lottery. People want to fuck Scarlett Johansson.
& Dave: What is wrong with you, dude? This is not a comic book, it’s real-life! When you’re dead, it’s done! There’s no sequel.
The Motherfucker: You made this real. You started it! Now I’m gonna finish it. I’ll be immortal, like an evil Jesus.
& Mindy: You don’t have to be a badass to be a superhero, Dave. You just have to be brave.
& Dave: What was that?
Mindy: That was my first kiss. Be nice or I’ll rip your ass out through your mouth.
& Dave: Superheroes can’t exist in the real world for a reason. It’s because the real world, needs real heroes.
--
+ quotes on the IMDb
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