The Old Man and the Seat

Rick and Morty 4x2

Glootie: Do you want to develop an app?

Rick: Now, if you'll excuse me, I've got a quick solo adventure to go on, and this one will not be directed by Ron Howard...
Summer: He's gonna go poop. When Grandpa Rick pats his belly like that and leaves without Morty, it means he's going to go poop. He's a shy pooper. He has a secret pooping place.

Jerry: I'll pass, Glootie.
Glootie: Hmm, your loss.
Jerry: Oh, yeah? Why's that?
Glootie: Eh, it's an app you'd want to develop.
Jerry: Can I ask what it is?
Glootie: Of course you can. That's always the first step in app development.

Morty: What are you guys doing? Did you develop an app?
Jerry: Rule number one in app development, son... never follow the rules.
Morty: Except when the rule is tattooed on an alien's forehead, Dad!

Summer: Whoa, this new app just matched me with a guy that is su my ty. Super my type. Learn to abbre.

Beth: Stupid phones are destroying us!

Tony: I thought you were a shy pooper. You know what shy pooping is, Rick? It's a pointless bid for control. You want to take the one part of life that you truly think is yours, and you want to protect it from a universe that takes whatever it wants.

---

Rick: Don't insult my craft. The chemical is Globaflyn. It connects the whatever-you-want section of your brain to the whatever-you-have section. If your heaven is toilets, that's on you.
Tony: All of these people...
Rick: Are living their wildest, meaningless dreams and leaving me out of them.
Tony: People you refuse to kill and refuse to let into your life.

Morty: Dad, I want to say something. I started today disgusted and embarrassed to be your son, and then later I thought we were gonna die because you're a loser.....
Jerry: There's no more, is there?
Morty: Nope. Now quit [BLEEP] up, and let's go.

Beth: I'm gonna mother you until your 18th birthday, even if I get thrown in prison for non-consensual mothering! And even then, I will break out, come to your house, kick down your door, and mother your [BLEEP] face out of your stupid asshole!
Summer: I'm gonna daughter your brains out, bitch!

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