Christmas Snow

South Park 23×10

Santa: Did you know that the holidays are when the most DUIs and drinking‐related accidents occur?
Drinking Beer Citizen: This is like that little Greta girl with the global warning. Buzz-kill!

Randy Marsh: Guys, my season is over. Tegridy Farms' season ended weeks ago.
Mayor McDaniels: We understand, but couldn't you do, like, a limited-edition run just to get people through the holidays?
Randy Marsh: You want me to do a Christmas special?
https://cumama.blogspot.com/2019/11/season-finale.html

Eric Cartman: You know what it means when our parents have no Christmas spirit? Shitty presents. We're screwed, you guys.
Butters Stotch: They just gotta get their Christmas spirits back! They just gotta!

Randy Marsh: Okay, cocaine's totally legal now.
Mayor McDaniels: It... It is?
Randy Marsh: Yeah. Legal in seven states, including this one. Other states are soon to follow. I told you... it's 2019, dawg.

Butters Stotch: I'm sorry, Santa. I just can't think of anything I want this year. I guess maybe now I'm losing my Christmas spirit.
Santa: Well, how about a little Baby Yoda doll?
Butters Stotch: Nah. "Mandalorian" was great the first few episodes, but it's really fallen apart lately.

Santa: Marijuana?! This isn't what Santa meant! I got rid of liquor, and now you assholes are all just getting high?! God [bleep] damn it! Santa will just see about this!

Randy Marsh: Oh, great. My daughter had a marijuana problem, and now she has a problem with cocaine.

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Commercial: .... During Christmas, don't you want your cocaine to be organic, pure, and locally grown? Cocaine that's grown locally has never been smuggled, so the only ass it's gonna be up is yours. Marijuana-Free Christmas Snow, now available from Tegridy Farms. It's cocaine that's farm-to-nostril.

Randy Marsh: Hold on tight, Towelie! We have to save Christmas!

Randy Marsh: Santa, that's not just cocaine. It's Tegridy cocaine.
Santa: Oh, don't give Santa that. Coke is coke.
Randy Marsh: That's not true. This cocaine is grown locally, by local people. Please, just try it.
Santa: ..... Wow, that is really clean.
Randy Marsh: Right?
Santa: It's, like, not speedy at all. It's really mellow. Honestly, I didn't know cocaine could be this pure. Wow.
Randy Marsh: Because it's grown here, on a farm. It's not cut with any nasty chemicals or harmful impurities.
Santa: No, you can tell it's really clean. Santa like-y. Maybe I have been a little too old‐fashioned in my thinking...

Santa: Jesus, you really got to try it... You cut out the middle men. Nobody dies in South America. Nobody dies from impurities.
Randy Marsh: Please, Jesus.

Jesus Christ: I think it's time for a little Christmas miracle...

Randy Marsh: Hey, guys. I'm so happy my Christmas Special turned out okay.
Santa: It's more than okay. Tegridy cocaine is smooth, and has a great finish.
Jesus Christ: I'll bet when coke becomes legal soon, everyone will want Tegridy cocaine.
Stephen Stotch: Well only one thing left to do now, gang. Let's go driving!

Commercial: All-natural Tegridy cocaine, endorsed and approved by Santa Claus. Available soon at a store near you.

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