Tech Evangelist

Silicon Valley 5×4

Richard: ...at least out here, we don't run the risk of running into anyone from the tech industry.
Yeah, they're all so old. But they look so happy.
Richard: Yeah. It's weird. I don't understand it either.

Richard: So... right now, I will send to you all the very first message... ever to be sent on a de-centralized, peer-to-peer Internet. Ready?...
Deedee: "Hit her."
Candice: I don't get it. Are you talking about me?
Richard: I meant to say "Hi there."
Deedee: Well, it definitely says "Hit her."

Richard: Who? How?
Jared: Good old-fashioned police work. I skimmed through all 40,000 of the staff's outgoing emails. And in addition to learning that we need to revise the office dating policy, because it is, essentially, the Olympic Village out there, I learned that someone has been sending...

Gilfoyle: I can't hold this smile forever, Jared. Get to the good stuff.

Jared: K-Hole? The creators of the game "Undead Sex Offender"? They're... they're huge.

Richard: ... Uh, they can talk to K-Hole. Tell them why they joined.
Laurie: Allowing you to speak less?.. Good strategy.

Richard: Just a straight-up boring, ordinary guy, but obviously not straight. Very gay, and also a Christian, right?

---

Deedee: Why did you say that?.. Richard, you just told a room full of tech people that I'm a Christian.
Richard: Oh.

Richard: Guys, it can't be that big of a deal, right?
Dinesh: Why should it be? America loves Christians. Muslims are the enemy.
Jared: Well, that's true in most of America, but not in Silicon Valley, sadly.

Jared: You can be openly polyamorous. And people here will call you brave. You can put micro-doses of LSD in your cereal, and... and people will call you a pioneer. But the one thing you cannot be is a Christian.

Gilfoyle: I find their theology to be illegitimate, and it's clear that they are the source of the majority of the world's problems. But, fuck, Richard, even I wouldn't just... out a Christian like that.

Richard: It's good. I guess... maybe it's just a little busy? Like, um, there's one word too many.
Deedee: One word?
Richard: Well, I like the gay part. If anything, it could be more gay. You should gay it up, and then, I like the "proud" part. It's just the...
Deedee: Christian part.

Deedee: Look, Richard, this is great, because now I can be gay and a Christian.
Or just be gay! You know, you could be a... a twink. A bear, an otter. A circuit queen, a chub, a pup. A gipster, a daddy chaser, a leatherman, a lady boy. .... Just... don't be a Christian.

Richard: I asked you to be a part of this because I thought you were willing to take a chance on my idea. An entirely new Internet. An Internet that is everything the old Internet is supposed to be, but isn't. Truly free and truly open. Well, I'm sorry, gang. Truly open means "open to everyone." No matter how repugnant their views are. How ignorant or stupid, or, to be honest, totally fucking wrong. And, look, who are we to judge, right? There's some people out there that believe that we're living in a computer simulation.
Colin: Well, that is supported by the evidence.
Richard: What?!
Colin: Uh, it's basic probability theory.

Richard: I'm gonna tear him a new asshole.

Dinesh: Is that Erlich in the bucket?

--
On the IMDb
+ Soundtracks