Barbara Ann

The Last Man on Earth 4×17

Todd: Look, Erica, I'm not gonna lie to you... I farted. Yeah, this is one of those weird cases where, you know, you smelt it but I'm the one who dealt it.

Todd: Don't need luck. Just time and gravity.

Mike: Did Mom and Dad do something to you when you were little?

Carol: I can't do it. Mm-mm. Ever since I was a kid, I've had a fear of being scared.

Todd: Don't worry. I-I took care of that.
Gail: Well, did you get rid of them?
Todd: Well, uh... I did the next best thing.

Todd: The-the trick is, don't think of 'em as dead bodies, you know? Think of 'em as, uh, people. The sequel.

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Gail: Todd, can you just cut the crap and tell us why we're standing in the middle of this Romanian horror film?

Mike: Okay, let's just find a boy and a girl and then we got ourselves a goat starter kit and we can go, all right?

Gail: Yep. Pure yayo... Good stuff. Bolivian. 18 bills, farm. 30K, street. She will take you for a ride, let you walk on the wind, then drop you like a bad trust fall.
Melissa: Why do you know so much about this?
Gail: Well, let's just say that the '80s and Gail Klosterman... had a love-love relationship.

Phil: Going a friendly, nonaggressive, "nice to meet you" 18 miles an hour.

Carol: Okay, so that's 75 bags of cocaine, 23 sticks of dynamite, 16 grenades, 82 normal guns, 36 scary guns and five severed heads. That's got to be it, right?

Gail: Stop! Did anyone check the piano?... Oh. Well, that don't look kosher.

Phil: Hey, look, hey, your answer might not even be human, you know?

Melissa: Just made it to the piano. Initiating protocol... Always wanted to say that.

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