Rickmurai Jack

Rick and Morty 5x10

Morty: Y-You're, like, looking, like, into crows...still.
Rick: Oh, uh, two crows, you remember Morty. Morty, two crows.

Rick: It's just that the battle for crows is kind of never-ending.
Morty: Huh. Right. A little pointless, then, right? That came out wrong, s-sounded judgy.

Rick: Time be goin' by, don't she?
Morty: That's your reaction to finding out you wasted your entire life?

Rick: Don't worry, honey. That's just Morty's middle age talking. He'll be less codependent once we get more of his life in front of him again.
Summer: Uh, I'd like him to stay 40 so he can keep buying my friends molly... I'd rather throw my vote away than use it to support a flawed system.

Morty: Rick?
Rick: Wubba lubba dub dub! I'm back, pal!

Rick: See ya later, masturbators.

President Morty: "Evil Rick." I love it. Smartest man in the universe, with an ego so big you can just grab it like a joystick.

Morty: I'm sorry, Rick.
Rick: That apology and a screwdriver in my hand would be worth a screwdriver.

President Morty: You sellout Mortys kill me. I'd hate you more than the Ricks you worship if there was any point. But you can't help it. You were bred for it. Wanna see?...

President Morty: There aren't infinite versions of our grandfather, Morty. He's an infinite smear of one shitty old man. And he's attached to us infinitely through his weakness and our forgiveness. This is why we're with him. This is why we're alive.

President Morty: Did you think my force field would be down the second time?
Rick: I was expressing disapproval of your dialogue.
President Morty: Disapprove all you want. Tonight, the quality of dialogue stops mattering. Tonight, I do that thing I want to do with the curve thing.

Morty: Whoa. Dead wife?
Rick: Yes, now everyone can shut up about it.
Morty: Wow, Rick, I feel a lot better having seen all that.
President Morty: Of course that's the case. In their minds, they're the underdogs. And that's how they justify this.
Rick: Morty, I'm not responsible for every [bleep]-up Rick out there.
President Morty: They literally all say that. They all have that excuse. It's part of their system. None of them have to be responsible. They're all victims of themselves.

President Morty: Do you know what the Central Finite Curve is? They built a wall around infinity. They separated all the infinite universes from all the infinite universes where he's the smartest man in the universe. Every version of us has spent every version of all of our lives in one infinite crib built around an infinitebaby. And I'm leaving it.

Prof. Poopybutthole: I guess things went downhill from there. Started isolating myself from Amy. Used to tell her everything I was feeling, but then I guess I stopped, 'cause I wanted her to love who she thought I was, not who I felt myself becoming. Ever think about how horrified the people we love would be if they found out who we truly are? So we just dig ourselves deeper into our lies every day, ultimately hurting the only people brave enough to love us.
     Wish I didn't do that. Wish I was brave enough to love them back. I don't know. Maybe you should try it. We don't have as much time as we think. Ooowee.

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