18 окт. 2013 г.

The Workplace Proximity

The Big Bang Theory 7×5

& Penny: Awkward silence. Sheldon on his phone. No touching. Somebody’s having date night.

& Penny: How do you not tear off his clothes and take him right here on this table?
    Sheldon: If you do that, I’ll scream.

& Amy: Well, this project would have us working in close proximity to one another. And there’s the vulgar adage that one should not defecate where one eats.
Sheldon: My father used to say that all the time. That and, um, “Who does one have to orally gratify to get a drink around here?” But what does that have to do with you working at the university?
    Amy: .... Sheldon, “Don’t defecate where you eat,” means don’t have a romantic relationship in the workplace.
    Sheldon: Really?

& Penny: You know, not a lot of people know this, but the monoamine oxidase enzyme was discovered by a woman, Mary Bernheim. .... That’s right. My phone is just as smart as you guys.

& Sheldon: Amy, Bernadette, Penny. Amy, Bernadette, Penny. Amy, Bernadette, Penny.
    Bernadette: He’s never gonna stop doing that, is he?
    Amy: I don’t mind. I’m hoping to put his love of repetition to good use someday.

& Raj: His only options here are to fake a heart attack or have a real one.

& Howard: My point is, I’m sure there are things about me that would drive you crazy if you had to deal with them all day long.
    Bernadette: Like looking me in the eye and lying to me?
    Howard: Oh, well, come on, I just... Where am I supposed to look when I lie to you?
    Bernadette: Find somewhere else to sleep tonight!


& Howard: You know, Sheldon, none of this would’ve happened if I hadn’t tried to help you.
    Sheldon: Uh, it also wouldn’t have happened if, in the early universe, hydrogen was a little more common or a little less common. This is fun. Your turn.

& Amy: And this is Dr. Gunderson from Stockholm.
    Sheldon: Ah, Sweden. Yeah, home of my favorite Muppet and, uh, second favorite meatball. ... Okay, the Nordic reputation for lack of humor is well-founded. Boy, is his name Gunderson or No-Funderson?

& Sheldon: Oh, please, I’m your boyfriend. You call me Sheldon. That’s right, I am in a boy-girl relationship with this cute little lump of wool.
    Amy: Sheldon...
    Sheldon: It’s a physical relationship, too. Hand-holding, hugging... even on hot days. Ow. Okay, here’s a new one. Apparently now we kick each other in the shin under the table.

& Sheldon: What on earth are you talking about? My behavior in the cafeteria was delightful. Maybe your friend Gunderson needs to head over to IKEA and assemble a sense of humor.

& Sheldon: I’m starting to get the sense that you’re angry with me.
    Amy: Really? What tipped you off?
    Sheldon: Couple things, actually. Your tone of voice, your body language...
    Amy: Get out.
    Sheldon: Well, now, that.

& Sheldon: Well, can you believe she said I embarrassed her?
    Penny: Yeah.
    Sheldon: But you didn’t even hear the details!
    Leonard: Sheldon... I’ve known you a long time, and I’m going to tell you this with all the love I can possibly muster... Amy’s right. You’re wrong.
    Sheldon: But you don’t even know...
    Leonard: Doesn’t matter.
    Sheldon: But, now, but in my defense...
    Leonard: Doesn’t matter.
    Sheldon: You’re not listening to my side of it!
    Penny: Okay, fine, Sheldon. What is your side?
    Sheldon: Well...
    Penny: Nope, got to go with Amy on this one.

& Sheldon: Amy, this isn’t easy to say. All relationships are difficult, but even more so when you’re in one with a person who struggles with everyday social interactions. And frankly... who can strike some people as being kind of a weirdo.
    Amy: Sheldon... you’re not a weirdo.
    Sheldon: I wasn’t speaking about me.

& Sheldon: ...Breaking the ice with your colleagues using ethnic humor, the funniest kind of humor.

& Sheldon: My point is, we’re a couple. And... I like you for who you are. Quirks and all.

--
On the IMDb

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