Amjad's Health Check

Citizen Khan 2×3

& Alia: I’m so proud of you, Papaji.
    Mr. Khan: Wow. You’re like the son your mother never gave me.
    Alia: Thanks. So, can I have some money?

& Mrs. Khan: We’re going to buy baby clothes. Exciting, isn’t it?
    Mr. Khan: Exciting?! It’s a bloody miracle!

& Abbas: Sorry, and you are?
    Mr. Khan: Mr Khan. Community leader. They all know me.
    Abbas: Tony Abbas, er, Member of Parliament.
    Mr. Khan: I know who you are. I’m MP, too.
    Abbas: Oh, really?
    Mr. Khan: Yes. Muslim Pakistani.

---

& Mr. Khan: I don’t know whether you’ve noticed, Dave, but you’re not part of the Asian community. Look at me. Face brown, hair black. That’s an Asian. Look at you. Face white, hair ginger. That’s a ginger.

& Mr. Khan: Amjad, don’t just stand there. Help me!
    Amjad: The lock’s jammed.
    Mr. Khan: Well, climb over, you idiot!
    Amjad: That’s dangerous!
    Mr. Khan: Amjad! I dragged myself 10,000 miles to this country. And you can’t even climb over a toilet cubicle?!

& Receptionist: Name?
    Mr. Khan: Mr Khan. K, H for hat, A for Asian, N for knowledge.

& Mrs. Khan: What are you talking about?
    Mr. Khan: Right. Ok. You know in the cricket, and you have balls, and sometimes you have fast balls, slow balls, white balls, red balls, and even wide balls? Well, sometimes you can end up with... no ball... And if it’s a no-ball, it’s no good because it won’t count. Do you see?
    Omar: So, his testicle has been repaired?

--
On the IMDb