The Scavenger Vortex

The Big Bang Theory 7×3

& Howard: I loved those. I did them every year there.
    Leonard: We did them at Princeton, too.
    Howard: Oh, that’s cute. Like it’s a real college.
    Sheldon: That’s amusing— I was going to say that about M.I.T., but it works for Princeton, too.

& Leonard: What’s all this?
    Sheldon: Oh, everything I could possibly need to win the scavenger hunt.
    Leonard: You really think he’s gonna send us to a bowling alley?
    Sheldon: Well, if he does, do you know how filthy those rental balls are? They might as well stand on the corner and give away free rectal exams.

& Raj: Any questions?
    Howard: Yes, to be fair... do people who went to Princeton get a head start?
    Leonard: That’s not funny.
    Sheldon: Oh, it actually is if you get the joke. It’s based on the premise that Princeton isn’t a very good school.
    Leonard: Ha-ha.
    Sheldon: Oh, see? Now he gets it.

& Should we just do couples?
    Leonard: Couples sounds great. Or.. we could mix things up. Maybe pick names out of a hat.
    Penny: Whoa, whoa... whoa. Why don’t you just admit you don’t want to be on a team with me.
    Leonard: I just said, “Couples sound great.”
    Penny: Mm-hmm, yeah, you don’t think I’m smart enough. You think I’m gonna be a liability. Even though I totally just used the word “liability” correctly in a sentence.

& Penny: Would you stop pouting? So, you picked my name. Get over it.
    Sheldon: Yes, and do you know what the odds are I’d pick your name?
    Penny: No.
    Sheldon: It’s not hard— one in five. Now you know why I’m pouting.

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& Raj: Do you see what I did? The first puzzle is a puzzle! Oh, my God, how adorable is that? I wish I had a friend like me.

& Howard: Wow, you’re really good at puzzles.
    Amy: I did them all the time as a kid. As my mom used to say, “When you’re doing a puzzle, it’s like having a thousand friends.” She was full of fun lies like that...
    Howard: If it makes you feel any better, my mom’s just full of pound cake.

& Penny: Wait. D-Don’t you want to know how I figured it out?
    Sheldon: No one likes a know-it-all, Penny.

& Leonard: Um, I’m okay with you driving my car. I’m not okay with you flying my car.

& Leonard: I’m telling her I’m quitting.
    Bernadette: No! Quitting would be the worst thing for your relationship.
    Leonard: Why?
    Bernadette: Because it would make you seem like something she already thinks you are.
    Leonard: What does she think I am?
    Bernadette: How do I put this?.. She’s been known to call you a name that usually applies to a lady part.
    Leonard: ....
    Bernadette: Or a cat.
    Leonard: ....
    Bernadette: Or a willow.

& Bernadette: If you’re gonna cry about it there’s tissues in my purse. Unless you got some in yours. Big willow.

& Penny: What are you talking about?
    Leonard: You know exactly what I’m talking about!
    Bernadette: No, she doesn’t. I just made that up.
    Leonard: Why would you do that?
    Bernadette: Because you were about to quit like a big— Sheldon, cover your ears.
    Sheldon: I’m not a child. I know the word “ninny.”

& Raj: See? Even I’m a winner!
    Leonard: Are you kidding me?!
    Penny: That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.
    Bernadette: You suck so hard.

& Raj: Come on, I didn’t want anyone to feel bad at the end of the game. And some of those puzzles were really hard and I didn’t know who was gonna get Penny.
    Penny: Run.
    Raj: Okay, okay, that-that came out wrong, but you have to admit, you all had a wonderful time.
    Penny: Run to India.

& Raj: I just wanted to do something beautiful!

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On the IMDb