The Slippery Slope: Part Two

A Series of Unfortunate Events 3×2

Woman With the Hair But No Beard: We know how to solve problems, don't we? Fire can solve any problem in the world.

Lemony Snicket: "Where there's smoke, there's fire" is an expression that means if something seems wrong, it usually is.

Count Olaf: Do you know how it feels to try so hard to please people who fail to recognize your talent?

Count Olaf: What kind of baby doesn't know how to start a fire?!

Count Olaf: Oh, please. I've seen better performances from a chimp with a cymbal. She's just acting like a helpless baby. I know. I'm an actor.

Henchperson of Indeterminate Gender: I'm beginning to question my life choices.

Violet: Are you ready?
Quigley: If we wait until we're ready...
Violet: We'll be waiting for the rest of our lives.

Hook-Handed Man: You're asking why a grown man would knowingly engage in morally questionable behavior?.. You'll understand when you're older.

Quigley: Celebrate when you're half done and the finish won't be quite as fun.

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Esmé Squalor: That sounds like work. Why do we have to do it?

Esmé Squalor: Being trapped in a hot tub is even less "in" than getting in a hot tub on purpose.

Quigley: Sometimes you have to fight fire with fire.
Violet: If everyone fought fire with fire, the world would go up in smoke.

Esmé Squalor: Sheesh, some days you just can't catch a break...

Esmé Squalor: That's the problem with your side of the schism. Being righteous and well-read never gets you anywhere.

Man With the Beard But No Hair: Be a man and slay that baby, putz.

Count Olaf: I am amazing, brainy, courageous, dashing, enchanting, famished, gifted, hilarious, in.. in... in... What's a good word to describe me that starts with an "I"?
Man With the Beard But No Hair: Idiot. You disappoint us, Olaf.

Man With the Beard But No Hair: To fighting fire with fire!
Woman With the Hair But No Beard: And watching the world go up in smoke!

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+ Quotes on the IMDb