Mondays, Am I Right?

The Good Place 4×11

Chapter 50

Chidi: ...and the three of us have a very important job.
Eleanor: To find out which former U.S. presidents were secretly gay!
Chidi: No.
Eleanor: Okay, fine, bi.
Chidi: Sure, but also...

Jason: ... Also, .... Pikachu, Karate Kid, Wendy from Wendy's, Grumpy Cat, and the GPS lady that tells you where to drive.

Eleanor: Oh, man. I never thought about the fact that we could look up our own files...

Eleanor: I love you, okay?!
Chidi: Oh. The words are nice, but the tone is scary.

Chidi: I don't need to read your file. I know you, and I love you. And I can't wait to spend eternity with you.

Eleanor: I can't risk it. What if we spend half of eternity together and then you find out something that does change the way you feel about me and then you resent me for wasting half your eternity?

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Megan: Okay, so, like, her parents were the chain saw bear, but instead of chopping off her head, they chopped off her self-esteem?
Vicky: Yes, Megan. Good. Take what you know about them and then force them into moments of personal difficulty. Think of it as flattening the penises of their heart.
Megan: Oh. Now it makes sense.

Janet: I've never said this before, but... what?

Michael: Pushing the rock up the hill gave me a purpose. Who am I... if the rock's gone?
Tahani: Ironically, that's exactly what Vin Diesel asked me when Dwayne Johnson refused to appear in "The Fast and the Furious 9..." Not helpful? Copy that.

Janet: Honestly... Michael, I don't know what's to become of you... or any of us. ... focus on that and deal with the future in the future.

Vicky: I'm not gonna let myself be degraded by you again. I am a strong, independent acid snake in the skin suit of a strong, independent woman.

Michael: No. It's you guys. The Judge agreed that the four of you don't need to take the test. Turns out that saving every soul in the universe is worth a few points. You're in.

Jason: Foles!

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