I Will Help You

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend 4×7

Josh Chan: I was too embarrassed to go home, so I'm sleeping at the YMCA. Don't listen to the song! It's not fun to stay there.

Rebecca: Okay, so, some things you need to know about the house. Uh, Wi-Fi password is "525,600minutes."....

Rebecca: I am so excited to see some fall foliage. I really miss East Coast seasons.
Josh Chan: We have seasons in L.A. T-shirt, sweatshirt, puffer and tank top.

Naomi: What? You think I don't have a Google alert for "Rebecca Bunch"? You think that I am not reading the comments section of the Daily Covina?

Naomi: .... Not to mention the meshuggener Josh Chan shenanigans. Or should I say "Chananigans." That's pretty good.

Naomi: Anyway... that's all in the past. It doesn't matter. What matters is, despite all the schmegegge chazzerai, you still made partner. ... So somehow all that meshigas made your career even better. Right?

Nathaniel: Tim! Jim! Baseball is fun. I like lemonade. Do you? Guys, where's Paula? She's AWOL again.

Naomi: Of course they're mean. Do you think the world of nonprofit Jewish women's charities is a warm, cozy place?

Naomi: ♪ So you want I should be known as the mother of a loser ♪
    ♪ Loser, loser ♪
    ♪ Meet my daughter, former lawyer ♪
    ♪ Now a failure, please excuse her ♪
    ♪ Excuse her, excuse her ♪

Naomi: ♪ Oy, what am I gonna tell Emilio ♪
    ♪ At the frame store? ♪
Emilio: ♪ Moms always worry about what semi-strangers gonna say ♪
    ♪ And they're right, we think about it all day ♪
    ♪ We judging you, we don't have our own lives ♪
    ♪ You're more important than our own kids and our own wives ♪

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Paula: Wow! That feels great. I feel all... warm and... Is this fuzzy? Is this what fuzzy is?
Nathaniel: Oh, please. What you just did is white savior crap. You can't just sweep in here and use your checkbook...
Nicky: I'm actually fine with it.
Nathaniel: Yeah, me, too. I just felt like I should say it.

Rebecca: Wait, do you actually know my mother?
Elayne Boosler: Of course. Naomi-Know-It-All.
Rebecca: Then why didn't you respond to her e-mails or phone calls?
Elayne Boosler: Have you met your mother? She's a pain in the kishkes.

♪ If you ever need a favor in 50 years ♪
♪ Just call a Camp Kavetcha girl ♪
♪ If you're crying off your makeup with all your tears ♪
♪ Just call a Camp Kavetcha girl ♪

Rebecca: I don't need to tell everyone everything all the time. ... I don't need outside approval from others, and I certainly don't need outside judgment from people I frankly don't care about. I know who I am now. Finally.

Rebecca: They are my choices, and as of right now, they are off-limits to you. Okay? So, look, we can chat, we can still gossip, we can kibitz, we can go out for a schmear, but that's it.

Rebecca: Hello. I'm back from Jew Hell. Which is nothing, 'cause Jews don't technically believe in Hell...

Rebecca: Oh, no, Paula. I think we're in trouble...

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