He Never Died (2015)

Jack: I'll find another intern.
Jeremy: Where are you gonna find another intern?
Jack: Money... people like money.

Jack: Abortions cost about $300. You could afford one.

I, uh, don't have money, so...
Jack: Then how did you end up inebriated?
Vaginas are like coupon books for alcohol.

Jack: I don't do much of anything anymore, but when I did, I did a little bit of everything.

Cara: Walking, bingo... and getting punched in the head. I know three things you like now.
Jack: That sums me up.

Cara: How?
Jack: I don't know.
Cara: What do you mean, you don't know?
Jack: I mean, I don't know.
Cara: That doesn't make any sense.
Jack: I didn't say it would.

Jack: Wine is supposed to mature with age... but I think 450 years may make it bitter.

Cara: How old are you?
Jack: I have no idea. But I'm in the Bible, if that means anything.

Jack: It is pronounced "Cayenne"... but I'm known as Cain.
Cara: I think I'm gonna throw up.

Jack: I'm not a fan of nine millimeters. I prefer something that can go through me.

Jack: No one else goes through this. I don't deserve this. I don't deserve this! Fuck God, because there isn't one! If there was, She wouldn't let this happen!

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+ Quotes on the IMDb