15 июл. 2013 г.

Baseball Was Better with Steroids

Two and a Half Men 6×24

& Charlie: How did she say it?
    Alan: What do you mean?
    Charlie: I mean, was it perfunctory or was there subtext?
    Jake: Perfunctory... That could be my rap name. MC Perfunctory.

& Chelsea: The question is: Are you happy? Are you available?
    Charlie: Oh, come on, Chels. What kind of question is that? No, I’m not available, and I’m certainly not happy... You know what I mean!
    Chelsea: I hope so.
    Charlie: Yep. I’m a happy and lucky man. Happy, happy, happy. Lucky, lucky, lucky. And wet. I’m kind of wet.

& Jake: Okay. So there’s this guy who on the highway Where he hits like a moose or something. And he loses control of his car and crashes into a truck full of toxic waste. And when he wakes up in the hospital, he’s part car and part animal. Car-nimal.


& Jake: What’s your idea?
    Alan: You really interested?
    Jake: Sure.
    Alan: Well, it’s, uh... it’s about a man, uh, who’s at a crossroads in his life, uh, coming to terms with, uh, loss and... and mortality.
    Jake: You know what you could call it?
    Alan: What?
    Jake: Boring.
    Alan: Thank you.
    Jake: Rated G... A-Y.

& Charlie: Alan, hit your kid for me.
    Alan: Do we really want to risk more brain damage?
    Jake: Thanks for sticking up for me, dad.

& Judith: My water just broke.
    Herb: Are you sure?
    Judith: .... Yes, I’m sure.
    Berta: I ain’t cleaning that up!

& Charlie: ...The passion of a new relationship going forever, but I kind of miss it. Maybe it’s just that the grass always looks greener, you know?
    Petey: You see this cooler?
    Charlie: Yeah.
    Petey: It’s carrying two light beers, a half a ham sandwich and my thumb. So you’ll excuse me if I lack a certain degree of interest in your romantic dilemma.
    Charlie: .... You got beer?

& Charlie: How’s the screenplay coming?
    Alan: Great.
    Charlie: Still on page one?
    Alan: Yeah, but now it really sizzles.

--
+ quotes on the IMDb

Σ "to be continued," huh? At the most interesting!

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