The Quality of Mercy

Mad Men 6×12

& Don: She’ll get in.
    Betty: I don’t know, Don. It is Miss Porter’s. Jackie Kennedy went there.
    Don: You mean Jacqueline... Kennedy... Onassis.
    Betty: What kind of medicine are you taking for this cold?
    Don: Formula 44.
    Betty: Yeah, I bet.

& Michael: Did you mention that Cran-Prune sounds like a glass of diarrhea?

& Crane: Listen, I wouldn’t bother you at home. Obviously I’m on the Coast, but I’ve got good news.
    Don: You finally found a hooker who will take traveler’s checks?
    Crane: Why did I tell you that?

& Ken: Chevy... is... killing me. I hate Detroit. I hate cars. I hate guns. I don’t even want to look at a steak anymore!

& Cutler: Kenny, you know, I once had a client cup my wife’s breast.
    Roger: Lee Garner, Jr. made me hold his balls.

& Bob: I think maybe I’m keeping you from discussing this freely. I understand Pete’s objections, but I will do whatever is decided.
    Cutler: Pete, there’s nothing to discuss. I like Bob, Chevy likes Bob. And if you don’t like Bob... we can find someone who does.

& Ted: Okay, it’s dark. Fish-eye lens, you’re the baby. Just, “Whaa! Whaa!” You do that.
    Don: Whaa! Whaa! Whaa!
    Ted: Okay. So there’s a crowd. Eight or nine people. It’s the whole coven. And there’s a crazy little old lady...
    Peggy: ’What you need is a mustard plaster.’
    Ted: And then there’s this wrinkled old man... ’You need a compress.’ And then a Jewish neighbor lady...
    Joan: ’How about a bowl of chicken soup?’
    Ted: Anyway, there’s one more of those, maybe. Then they all start crowding in on you. And the Japanese takes a picture and the flash turns it white. Then you see the beautiful, radiant young mother...
    Peggy: ’You don’t need anyone’s help but St. Joseph’s.’

---

& Mandy: Let me guess, dad’s remarried, mom’s fat and sad.
    Sally: No, they’re both remarried, but my dad’s wife is my age.
    Mandy: Well, I’d like to feel sorry for you, but things are about to get worse.

& Don: I think, and correct me if I’m wrong, that when you say you want a reason, you want to know why we would push you like this...
    Byron: It would help.
    Don: Well, the truth is that I don’t think Ted wants to say. ’Cause it’s, well, it’s a little bit personal. In fact, it’s very personal.

& Ted: That was your solution? Try and embarrass me?
    Don: You’re embarrassing yourself. I know your little girl has beautiful eyes, but that doesn’t mean you give her everything.
    Ted: That has nothing to do with it!
    Don: Come on, we’ve all been there. I mean, not with Peggy...
    Ted: Don’t say that about her!
    Don: Ted, you’re kidding yourself. Everybody sees it. Just ask your secretary. Your judgment is impaired. You’re not thinking with your head.

& Bob: What do you want?
    Pete: Well, for one thing, I wanted you to stop smiling.

& Pete: Where you are and who you are is not my concern. I surrender.
    Bob: So what does that mean to me?
    Pete: I want you to graciously accept my apologies. Work alongside me, but not too closely.
    Bob: Again, I don’t understand.
    Pete: Yes, you do. I’m off-limits.

& Betty: Now get me a cigarette and give me some details. You want one, don’t you? Go ahead. I’d rather have you do it in front of me than behind my back... I’m sure your father has given you a beer.
    Sally: My father has never given me anything.

& Don: I saved both of you. How do you think it looks?
    Peggy: You hate that he is a good man.
    Don: He’s not that virtuous. He’s just in love with you.
    Peggy: Well, you killed him. You killed the ad. You killed everything. You can stop now.
    Don: I’m just looking out for the agency.
    Peggy: You’re a monster.
Ω Sentence?

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