The Brass Teapot

& Alice: If I had a million dollars, I’d stay in bed with you all day.

& Mr. Tutor: Think about what we talked about. Productivity, performance, punctuality. The three main pivot points to you recapturing your optimal performance level.

& John: It’s not a paycheck! Alice, this is not a job.
    Alice: Good. Most people kill themselves for decades and get nowhere. It’s a gift from the gods, John.

& John: Two Hasidim Jewish men came and beat the shit out of me in my own house... When I was wearing a silk, pink robe.

& Alice: One of us needs to go to the bathroom, baby.
    John: I went last time.
    Alice: I went yesterday.
    John: Hmm. Fine. But you’re going to the bathroom the next two times, okay?

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& Louise: What happened to you?
    Alice: Uh... I had a skiing accident.
    Louise: It’s a tough life.

& Chuck: Look, if you need a job or something, you can work here. It pays shit, but at least the benefits are... No, there’s no benefits.

& Alice: I’m sorry for this in advance... Some men are destined to fail, John. And you’re one of them.

& Alice: There is nothing evil about wanting more. There’s nothing evil about that teapot. It’s precious.
Ω Precious-s-s!

& Alice: Oh, my god. That could have been us.

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+ quotes on the IMDb