Derek 1×0

Pilot

& Derek: My favourite thing on here is YouTube. My favourite YouTube thing is animals. And my favouritest animal thing is hamster on a piano. Listen.

& Hannah: Do it subtly. Ask him his favourite films, and see if he’s gay or not. But be subtle. Just bring it up.
    Derek: .... My, um, friend Hannah, um... she says you might be gay, right, but you mustn’t... and she wants to know, but to not tell her, but if you just tell me your favourite TV programmes and films, then she’ll know if you’re gay or not.
    Tom: OK. Tell her I love Glee, I think it’s fab. Tell her The Wizard Of Oz is my favourite film cos of Judy Garland. And that I love her daughter, Eliza, as well. Tell her my absolute favourite is Audrey Hepburn, cos that girl had class. And if she likes all of them, you tell her from me, ’Hmm-mm, you go, girl!’ Can you do that?
    Derek: Yeah.
    Tom: Do it for me.
    Derek: ’Hmm-mm!’

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& Dougie: Average age is about 85 up there. Some of them up there are knackered. I don’t know at what point you can say a life is ended, cos some of them don’t move. You know, their knees have gone, their backs have gone, their eyes have gone, their ears have gone. Jack, with his hearing aid, battery on the side of his head, battery runs out, I don’t see the point of putting a new battery in.
    Derek: But what would you do, if you was Jack and somebody said, “It’s not worth it”, what would you say? “No, I need a battery, please.” What would you do if you was old, like a tortoise, and someone said, “Don’t bother with him, he’s 100...” I’d save you.

& Derek: She’d tap me on the head... She’d go, “It’s all right,” and it’d make me feel better straightaway. Like magic. And she said, “Kindness is magic, Derek.” She said it’s more important to be kind than clever or good-looking. I’m not clever or good-looking, but I’m kind.

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On the IMDb