The Wildebeest* Implementation
Season 4, Episode 22
& Bernadette: Amy, you must’ve been in the bathroom with other women before.
Amy: Of course I have. But they were strangers and seemed off-put when I engaged in friendly stall-to-stall chit-chat.
Bernadette: Some women don’t like to get chummy* when their panties are down.
& Amy: She always this crabby when she urinates?
Bernadette: We’re really not that close.
Penny: Screw it! I’ll go later.
& Amy: Leonard’s new girlfriend is testing Bernadette’s loyalty to you and the group. That bitch is crafty.
Bernadette: You think?
Amy: Of course. How does the cheetah attack a herd of wildebeests?.. By going after its weakest member.
Bernadette: Well, what makes me the weakest member?
Amy: Your trusting nature coupled with your teeny-tiny body. You wouldn’t last a minute on the Serengeti.
& Penny: I’m not concerned about who hangs out with who. And I certainly don’t have a problem with Leonard’s new girlfriend who wears way too much makeup.
& Penny: Ooh, these are cute. Of course if I buy them, I’ll have to rent my womb out to a gay couple.
& Bernadette: I don’t know. I’m not a very good liar. They kind of whup* that out of you in Catholic school.
Amy: Don’t worry. I’ll teach you. I did two years of Cub Scouts before they found out I was a girl.
& Amy: How do you feel about concealing a recording device in the cleavage of your ample bosom?
Bernadette: I don’t want anything in my ample bosom.
Amy: Come on, Strawberries. Take one for the team.
& Leonard: Okay, see you later.
Sheldon: Good news. I finally have a handle on my idea for three-person chess.
Leonard: That is good news. Bye.
& Sheldon: I also invented two new chess pieces. The serpent... and the old woman.
Leonard: Okay, now I have to ask. What do they do?
Sheldon: When the serpent slithers to an opposing player’s piece, that piece is considered poisoned and will die after two more moves.
Leonard: All right.
Sheldon: Unless... it gets to the old woman in time, in which case she sucks out the poison, turning her into the Grand Empress: a piece combining the power of the knight, queen and serpent.
Leonard: Elegant.
Sheldon: That’s because it’s simple.
& Sheldon: I must say, ever since you started having regular intercourse, your mind has lost its keen edge. You should reflect on that.
Leonard: Excuse me, but Einstein had a pretty busy sex life.
Sheldon: Yes, and he never unified gravity with the other forces. If he hadn’t been such a hound dog, we’d all have time machines.
& Amy: Did you know that women wear high heels to make the buttocks and breasts more prominent?
Leonard: Hadn’t really thought about it.
Amy: Look. ......
Leonard: Uh, sure. Very... prominent.
& Amy: Try not to ogle* my caboose* as I walk away.
& Leonard: Hey, Raj, will you be joining us for dinner?
Raj: The lonely guy and the two happy couples? I’d rather get a prostate exam from a leper who walks away with nine fingers.
& Priya: Oh, would you please stop feeling sorry for yourself?
Raj: I have to feel sorry for myself. I’m the only one who cares. Just like I’m the only one who’ll have sex with me.
& Raj: Excuse me. I’m going to go wander the streets alone. Invisible, unwanted and unloved, a pathetic shadow in a city with no heart. ....... I forgot my windbreaker. It’s chilly.
& Amy: Priya just made a snide comment about your acting career.
Penny: W-What the hell did she say?
Amy: She thinks it’s cool you’re following your dream, no matter what.
Penny: That bitch!
Amy: How do you want to handle it?
Penny: Um, okay. Tell Bernadette to tell Priya that I’m on my way to Prague to shoot a movie with Angelina Jolie.
Amy: Got it. Is it going to be in
& Sheldon: Knight to old woman... six-and-a-third.
Sheldon: Brilliant move.
Sheldon: Thank you.
Sheldon: Will the two of you excuse me?
Raj: I need a hug.
Sheldon: Sorry, I have company.
& Sheldon: I don’t want to hug you.
Raj: I don’t want to hug you, either. I was just feeling blue.
Sheldon: Blue, as in depressed?
Raj: Well, not so much depressed as lonely.
Sheldon: I don’t know what color lonely is.
Raj: What?!
Sheldon: Red is angry, yellow is frightened, green is jealous, and blue is depressed. Perhaps we can assign a color to lonely.
& Raj: What are you doing?
Sheldon: I’m working on my three-person chess game.
Raj: Oh, cool. Can I play?
Sheldon: .......... It’s three-person chess. Did you bring a friend?
Raj: No.
Sheldon: Then as a mental exercise I invite you to figure out why the two of us can’t play three-person chess.
& Sheldon: Social protocol does require me to bring you a hot beverage in your time of need.
Raj: No, thank you. I’m fine.
Sheldon: It’s not optional. ... We’re out of tea. I hope you like bouillon.
& Raj: Sheldon, listen to me. I have a big decision to make, and I’m scared.
Sheldon: Yellow. Go ahead.
& Sheldon: What’s in it?
Raj: I’m not sure. Some sort of beta-blocker attached to a molecule extracted from the urine of cows.
Sheldon: I like cows.
Raj: That’s not the point.
Sheldon: It was its own point. Go on.
& Priya: Okay, I’m still trying to work this out. How did Penny meet an astronaut?
Bernadette: I don’t know. The regular way people meet astronauts.
& Raj: Thank you for coming with me, Sheldon. You’re a good friend.
Sheldon: I’m glad you think so. That’s what I strive to emulate.
& Raj: My name is Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali, and this is my friend Dr. Sheldon Cooper.
Angela: Hi.
Sheldon: There’s no need to interact with me. I’m just here to observe.
Angela: What’s he observing?
Raj: We’re scientists. We observe everything. Here, go buy yourself a scone.
& Sheldon: I’d like to buy a scone.
- Oh, I’m sorry, we’re out. We have muffins.
Sheldon: They sound delicious, but this money is earmarked for scones.
--- Dict:
Wildebeest — антилопа гну
chummy —
общительный —
whip out — выгонять плетью
ogle — строить глазки
caboose — камбуз
On Imdb.
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