West Side Story

Two and a Half Men 11×18

& Barry: Kate was the great love of his life, who he met by pretending to be poor. By the time he told her the truth, she’d become a successful designer and moved to China. At first, they e-mailed frequently, but it tapered off over time. Now he just uses Google Earth to look in her bedroom window. But the image hasn’t refreshed, so he just stares for hours at a photo of a Hong Kong cab driver named Bao Ling...

& Barry: If you don’t want me to know, come up with a harder password. «Q-D-backslash-seven-two dollar-symbol big-C-little-K»...

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& Gretchen: Jeff, do you not want me to see your place? You’re worried about your porn? Don’t. I love porn.
    Alan: You’re perfect.

& Berta: Puking all night and screwing all day. It’s like Charlie never left.

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+ quotes on the IMDb