Leap Day

Modern Family 3×17

& Phil: Oh, no. Not today.
    Luke: What’s wrong?
    Phil: Nothing. No, your mom’s just, uh, feeling emotional.
    Luke: She was like this last month. And the month before. And the month before.

& Phil: I heard rumors. Yeah. We all had. That females living or working in close quarters... could eventually get on the same cycle. But I always assumed that was a story designed to keep women out of the submarine corps.

& Phil: It happened. Satan’s trifecta. The day I most dreaded had fallen on the day I most loved.

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& Phil: Shh! The first rule of dealing with the cycle: You never mention the cycle. You tiptoe around it. The woman’s actually taking great pains to hide the monster she’s become. But if you acknowledge it, that brings the monster forth.
    Luke: My God. And there’s three of them!

& Luke: It smells like puke married poop and had the ceremony in my nose.
    Manny: You paint with words.

& Phil: Yeah, I made a mistake today, but only because the three of you ganged up on me, like when the Wolfman, Dracula and Frankenstein showed up in the same movie, only this wasn’t awesome!

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+ quotes on the IMDb