The One with the Stripper

Friends 8×8

Chandler: I can't believe you didn't tell me. You know that the two pillars of marriage are openness and honesty.
Monica: Ugh. I knew giving you that book was gonna come back and bite me in the ass.

Dr. Green: How about I order everyone the Moroccan chicken?
Phoebe: Oh, I don't eat meat.
Dr. Green: It's chicken.
Phoebe: Yeah, I don't eat that either.
Dr. Green: I'll never understand you lesbians.

Dr. Green: Are you really pregnant?
Rachel: Well, uh, yes and no. Except, not no. So to sum it up, yeah.

Dr. Green: Who is the father? Oh, no. Please don't tell me it's her.

Rachel: You're gonna be a poppy.
Dr. Green: That's true. I'm a poppy. I'm gonna be a poppy... So when is the wedding?
Rachel: The who?

Dr. Green: Young lady, don't you sit there and tell me my first grandchild is gonna be a bastard! Rachel Karen Green, tell me there's gonna be a wedding.
Rachel: February 2nd.

Ross: Well, I haven't actually told her yet. I don't wanna scare her off.
Chandler: Well, you have to be honest with her... otherwise you may think that you're going down the same path... but you're really going down different ones.
Joey: I'm gonna take that book and I'm gonna beat you to death with it.

Monica: Please, I feel so bad. Just watch the hot woman get naked.
Chandler: Fine, but I'm only doing this for you.
Joey: Yeah...
Chandler: And Joey.

Phoebe: I'm sorry I won't be able to make it to your imaginary wedding... but I'm really busy that day. I already have a unicorn baptism and a leprechaun bar mitzvah.

Ross: I love her like a friend.
Dr. Green: Oh, really? That's how you treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then you refuse to marry her?

—
+ Quotes on the IMDb
+ Soundtracks