Dollar Store

Maid 1×1

Jody: So you're looking for a big, fat government handout because you are a jobless, white trash, piece of shit, am I right?

Jody: All right. The child in your lap is Maddy.
Maddy: And Schmariel.
Jody: What?
Alex: Uh, it's the Ariel that we got from a dollar store. So we call her Schmariel.

Jody: Honestly, without a job, I can't do squat.
Alex: Okay. Um... I can't get a job if I can't afford day care.
Jody: Well, we have access to subsidized day care grants once you have a job.
Alex: I need a job to prove that I need day care in order to get a job? What kind of fuckery is that?

Alex: I can't deal with him and his fake Australian accent.
Basil: It's not fake. I was born in Perth, so...
Alex: I'm sure you were, Cilantro.
Paula: Don't call Basil Cilantro, Alex. Our identity is subjective. He's Australian, I'm French-Italian. In reality, we're both 100 percent Icelandic fairy.

—
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