Silicon Valley 6×1
Gilfoyle: He looks like a child in a custody hearing.
Dinesh: But, like, you don't feel sorry for him. You just want him to go away and not have any parents at all.
Richard: Facebook owns 80% of mobile social traffic. Google owns 92% of search, and Amazon Web Services is bigger than their next four competitors combined. ... Even Hooli can't survive these monopolies. No one can! They track our every move, they monitor every moment in our lives, and-and they exploit our data for profit. And you can ask them all the questions you want, but they're not gonna change, they don't have to. These companies are kings, and they rule over kingdoms far larger than any nation in human history. They won, we lost.
Richard: [But] look at where we are. We are in the seat of the US government... a government that was founded by people who were, at one point, ruled by kings they couldn't overthrow. So, what did they do, right? They started over. They came here, to the New World. World 2.0, version 1776.
Richard: And the way we win is by creating a new, democratic, decentralized Internet, one where the behavior of companies like this will be impossible, forever. One where it is the users, not the kings, who have sovereign control over their data. This, I promise to you: I will help you end this tyranny by building an Internet that is of the people, by the people, and for the people, so help me God.
Jared: I-I just wanted to toast— Don't worry, it's short. The word companion derives from the Latin word "panis" for bread, and while I can no longer digest bread, I know that you leaven my life...
Richard: How long have you been collecting user data?
Colin: Sorta... the whole time. But it's just to improve the quality of my gameplay. I'm not using it to sell ads.
Richard: Shit, I just lied to Congress.
Colin: No. You said a lie to Congress, but you didn't know at the time, I guess. ... But going forward, maybe stop saying that... Or do say it. I don't care. Maybe it'll be like Google saying "Don't be evil", or Facebook saying "I'm sorry, we'll do better", or me saying "Gates of Galloo does not leave your headset mic open and record everything you say. Suck it."
Richard: It goes against everything we stand for! I mean, if we start collecting personal data "just for the good stuff", I mean, next thing we know, we're fucking Facebook!
Dinesh: Well, for the record, I would not mind being fucking Facebook.
Dinesh: You know what's not too complicated? Hawaii. In Hawaii, aloha means hello and goodbye. They use the same word to mean two things that are the exact opposite. That's awesome, and I have a chance to go there as long as Colin is on our network. Aloha.
Gilfoyle: This is the cost of working with humans, Richard. They suck.
Paul: Mr. Bezos simply felt that the Hooli name had... What were his exact words? Um "A... stink."
Gavin: You tell Bezos we keep the Hooli name, or he can go fuck himself with his rocket ship. What is Amazon anyway? Is it a river? Is it a giant woman? It's not clear. No. We keep the name Hooli. That's a deal breaker.
Richard: So, Dinesh thinks this is you?
Gilfoyle: Correct.
Richard: He's been messaging with it all day and he has no idea it's an AI. Well, we fooled a human. I guess we just passed the Turing test.
Gilfoyle: Almost a human.
Gilfoyle: No, I didn't train it. Son of Anton did.
Richard: Son of Anton?
Gilfoyle: An homage to a fallen friend. It's the name that I've given our new inference API. He's indexing all of PiperNet as we speak, and he's starting to recognize intent, emotion, causality...
Dinesh: Was that not you?
Gilfoyle: Complicated question. Is your shadow you?
Dinesh: Was that a bot?
Gilfoyle: Yes.
Dinesh: So, I spent all day chatting with a bot?
Gilfoyle: Yes.
Dinesh: You made an AI Gilfoyle?
Gilfoyle: Yes.
Dinesh: And I was talking to it?
Gilfoyle: Do you need the real me for this conversation?
Dinesh: Hey, could you make me an AI Dinesh?
Jared: So, even if this is wrong, I suppose you could argue that it's wrong in the service of rightness.
Richard: Yeah. It's, um... it's, uh, unethical in the defense of ethics.
Jared: Uh, unjust in the quest for justice. It's like stealing from your pimp to pay for your friend's appendectomy.
Jared: Let's break something...
Gilfoyle: At some point, AI Dinesh is going to reach out to AI Gilfoyle.
Dinesh: Oh fuck...
Gilfoyle: Oh fuck indeed.
Tracy: Over seven million emails. All on our servers—
Gilfoyle: My servers.
Tracy: Virtually all containing racist invective, and pornographic diagrams. Care to explain?
Dinesh: AI glitch.
Gilfoyle: Human error. I will rectify.
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