Golden Years

& Caretaker: Mr. Goode, I can assure you the residents receive a balanced nutritional offering.
    Arthur: A what?
    Caretaker: A nutritional offering... Calorific intake... What they eat!
    Arthur: Oh. Well, why didn’t you say so?

& Martha: It’s pride. Eats away at the man side of them, like trying to make them vegetarian. Iris did that to her husband — made him go vegetarian. For his health, she said. Pined away for a want of a sausage, he did.
    Shirley: Like you and me.

& Arthur: But that’s daylight robbery!
    Financial consultant: Sir, with all due respect, it’s economics.

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& Thelma: If you ever feel the need to give yourself a little boost and your fella’s having a quiet spell... then all you need is some playt’ings.
    Shirley: What’s «playt’ings»?.. Oh.

& Stringer: I’m including security guards as witnesses.
    Sergeant: So am I, sir, and they didn’t see nothing.
    Stringer: Didn’t see anything, sergeant. Not home to Mr. Double Negative, are we?

& Martha: You could go to prison. You could be shot, Arthur. I don’t want to be a widow. I want you with me to grow old— older with me.

& Royston: They may take our lives, but they can never take our pensions.
    Brian: They already have.
    Royston: They may take our pensions, but they can never take our lives.

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