Chutes and Ladders

American Horror Story: Hotel

5×2

& Liz Taylor: I’ve always admired the Swedes and their chocolate. It’s a wonder they stay so thin.
    Iris: Chocolate’s the Swiss.

& Donovan: Come on. Let’s stay in. We could binge-watch House of Cards.

& Mr. March: Laundress?
    Evers: Yes, sir?
    Mr. March: Replace the linens.
    Evers: Right away, sir. I’ll get the ammonia. What a glorious stain!

& Sally: Kids are the best.

& Duffy: Jesus Christ. I look amazing. I would do me.

& The Countess: You now have a supercharged immune system.
    Duffy: Can a bullet take me out? A silver bullet or a stake?
    The Countess: Bitch, please, of course it can. You’re only immortal if you’re smart.

---

& Duffy: So you lived through, like, the wars and the depression and... Clinton and everything. What was your favorite time?
    The Countess: Every decade has its decadence period. That’s when I’m most alive. I loved the late 1970s the most.

& Donovan: I love you.
    The Countess: And I love you. But you will learn— it isn’t our precious virus that makes you. It isn’t who you kill or who you screw. It’s the heartbreaks. The bigger, the better.

& Iris: Why don’t you take these bracelets off of me? I’ll tell you what you want to know. There’s just one thing you got to do...
    John: What?
    Iris: Ask nice. And buy a lady a drink.

& Iris: Well, if you want to know what this place is about, you have to know about the man who built it— James Patrick March.

& John: You’re in the wrong profession. You should be writing for the movies.
    Iris: Ain’t a movie. This place is the real deal. If you want to know what’s really going on here, you’re gonna have to expand your thinking a bit.

& Duffy: Just ’cause I’m sucking on a dude doesn’t mean I’m gay.

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On the IMDb

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