Virgin Territory

Modern Family 3×16

& Luke: A little help here.
    Manny: You can’t expect me to focus... when Miranda Cornell lives right down your street. She’s like a dream wrapped in a wish... poured into jeggings.

& Phil: Okay, okay! We’re gonna have to settle this dispute in court— the food court. The Honorable Judge Cinnabon presiding.
    Haley: The food court? That place smells like the inside of Luke’s bicycle helmet.
    Lily: I like the food court.
    Alex: Me too.
    Phil: Don’t worry, girls. We’re not gonna deprive ourselves... just ’cause Haley’s aversion—
    Alex: ...... Oh. Oh. Haley’s aversion. I thought you said— Never mind!

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& Phil: So, Haley. The thing is— ’Fact— Haley’s almost 18. Fact— I am the cool dad... "Haley, I understand that sex is a part of life. I can’t say that I’m thrilled to hear this, but I’m sure you’re being safe, and I hope that you’ll feel free to talk to me about this anytime..."’ We should— We should probably get Beatrice, like, a cast or something. We can all sign it.
    Haley: Yeah?
    Phil: Uh, yeah. Sure. ’Fact— I blew it.’

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