Punkin Chunkin

Modern Family 3×9

& Phil: Claire’s always had some issues with Kenneth.
    Claire: He would stare at me a little too long.
    Phil: Can you blame him? You used to dress sexy back then.
    Claire: ?????

& Gloria: Mi amor, I’m so proud of you. Is there nothing in the world that you can’t do?
    Jay: Centerpieces, for starters.
    Gloria: Shh!
    Jay: Why do you say everything of his is great, even if it isn’t?
    Gloria: Because I’m building him up. That’s what parents do.
    Jay: Too much, if you ask me. Kids cross the street nowadays, they get a ribbon.

& Alex: I can’t face Mom. If I see her, I’m gonna have to confess.
    Haley: Take a breather. it’s just a dent. And saying nothing is not lying, okay? It’s just letting the truth speak for itself.
    Alex: This is not the time for moral equivocation.
    Haley: Okay, I don’t know what that means, and also, don’t tell me.

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& Jay: You’re a talented kid. You’re gonna be a big success in the world. But this— it’s a swing and a miss.
    Manny: Well, but my mom said it was— «It’s great.»
    Jay: Yeah, I know. But how did she say it?
    Manny: What do you mean?
    Jay: There’s a big difference... between «It’s great» and "It’s great«— You hear that? «It’s great» and «It’s great. »
    Manny: All I hear is a bunch of people telling me I’m great.
    Jay: And that’s a problem, because a lot of times people will lie to you to protect your feelings, and that’s not doin’ you any favors. You get a lot farther in life... if you know what you’re good at and what you’re not. Now, you can handle that, right? Yeah. Of course you can. How you doin’, honey?
    Alex: I’m great—.

& Claire: For the record, I don’t squash all of Phil’s dreams. Just the ones that are, you know, potentially fatal.

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