12 дек. 2014 г.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

& Vernon: You ever heard the expression, «Never take candy from a baby»? It’s because even babies love candy!

& Michelangelo: What was that?
    Donatello: It’s a camera flash.
    Michelangelo: We know it’s a camera flash. Who’s behind the camera flash?
    Donatello: By my calculations, it’s a girl.
    Leonardo: Now we got to kill her...
    Donatello: What?
    Leonardo: With kindness! Give her some flowers, earn her trust.

& Raphael: I got this. Give me the camera.
    Michelangelo: Ooh, look, he’s doing his Batman voice.
    Donatello: She’s so hot, I can feel my shell tightening.
    Raphael: We can hear you!

& April: What are you?
    Leonardo: Well, miss, we’re ninjas.
    Raphael: We’re mutants!
    Donatello: Technically, we’re turtles.
    Michelangelo: And we’re teenagers. But we can have adult conversations.
    April: So, you’re... Ninja Mutant Turtle Teenagers?
    Donatello: When you put it like that, it sounds ridiculous!

& Michelangelo: Hey, have you seen that video where the cat is playing Chopsticks with chopsticks?


& Splinter: Of course, you’ve all tasted the five-cheese pizza. But this... cheesemongers have speculated its existence for centuries. Da Vinci’s original masterpiece. I submit you... Novantanove Formaggio, The 99-cheese pizza!
    Michelangelo: It’s not possible...
    Donatello: Mikey, it’s a trap! Pizza with that variety of cheese is a culinary impossibility!
    Splinter: Shall I list the ingredients? Cheddar... Provolone...
    Leonardo: Mikey, don’t you do it!
    Splinter: Asiago...
    Donatello: Keep it together!
    Splinter: Pelago...
    Michelangelo: I don’t even know what that is...
    Splinter: Mozzarella, of course...
    Michelangelo: Okay, okay, okay... We left the lair because the Foot were taking hostages, and there was this girl named April O’Neil who took our picture... but we took care of it!

& Bernadette: Is there anything else we should know about them?
    April: They’re ninjas.

& Vernon: So they’re... aliens?
    April: No, that’s stupid. They’re turtles. They help people, I guess.

& Splinter: ...I became their father and they became my sons. Like all children, they were drawn to the distractions of popular culture. And I knew one day they would want to explore the world above. They would be ridiculed. They would need to learn to protect themselves, both mentally and physically.

& Vernon: Yeah, I’ve thought about... I’ve thought about doing, not becoming a ninja, but I was doing a bunch of yoga for like, 10 days at one point, and, uh, I pulled a hamstring.

& Donatello: Are you guys okay?
    Leonardo: We’re bulletproof...
    Raphael: Sweet!

& Raphael: No, no, no! Oh, no... Poor Leo, April... And that other guy. They were so young, so beautiful.
    Leonardo: They ain’t dead, numb nuts.
    Raphael: Oh. Right on.

& Raphael: Cowabunga!

& Leonardo: Donnie, what are the odds of surviving this?
    Donatello: 0.00000003%!
    Leonardo: I’ll take it! Nobody moves, no matter what.

& Leonardo: I think this is it, guys! Does anyone have anything they wanna say? Donnie?
    Donatello: I’m the one who eats the icing off the pop tarts in the morning and puts them back in the box!
    Michelangelo: I so did not understand the ending of Lost.
    Leonardo: Raph?
    Raphael: I just... uh, uh... If this our last moment together......

--
+ quotes on the IMDb


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