Auntie Noor

Citizen Khan 3×3

& Keith: Salman I like him, Mr Khan.

& Mr. Khan: You know, now Alia is training to be an imam, maybe we could do the conversion for you. Why don’t we start with snippy-snippy?

& Mr. Khan: Hello, sweetie!
    Auntie Noor: Oh, well! Hello, sweetie yourself!

& Mr. Khan: Alia, sweetie, you can’t be a model. What about your exams?
    Alia: Don’t need exams to be rich and famous.
    Auntie Noor: Quite right. People like us don’t need boring exams and jobs. After all, we have Kim Kardashian.
    Alia: She’s amazing.
    Auntie Noor: She IS amazing.
    Mr. Khan: Who are they talking about?
    Shazia: A stupid woman with a big bum.

& Shazia: Are you going to say something?
    Mr. Khan: She chupped me!

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& Mr. Khan: I’m going to kill HER... Now listen here, Ellie Big Mac-pherson...

& Alia: Is New York anywhere near LA? Maybe I’ll be a film star, too.

& Mr. Khan: God, this is Mr Khan speaking. Community leader. They all know me. Obviously, you know me. Now look, mate, if you get me out of this, I promise I’ll never abuse my wife’s staff discount card again. And... I’ll go on a pilgrimage to Mecca. If all the cheap flights haven’t gone. And my credit card doesn’t get declined.

& Auntie Noor: Well, that was a waste of time. That man’s not rich. I looked in his wallet. There’s more plastic in my buttocks.

& Mrs. Khan: How could you abuse my trust like this?
    Mr. Khan: It hasn’t been easy...

& Alia: I don’t want to work in a stupid supermarket! I want to be a supermodel in New York!

& Mr. Khan: All right, sweetie?
    Mrs. Khan: Don’t you «all right, sweetie» me!

& Mr. Khan: You know, my darling, sometimes dreams come true. Mine did.
    Mrs. Khan: What? You mean the one where you’re Superman and you’re flying around the Bullring? In your underpants?
    Mr. Khan: No, not that one.

& Mrs. Khan: Well done, beti. You made the right choice. I know stacking shelves may not be very glamorous, but you will learn more from that than any fancy-pancy modelling jobs.
    Alia: Yeah. I won’t be stacking shelves, though...
    Mrs. Khan: What?
    Brian: Alia’s got the perfect look to be the face of our new range of fashion hijabs.
    Mr. Khan: Allah hu Akbar! I told you she was a model Muslim daughter!

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On the IMDb