The Gorilla Dissolution

The Big Bang Theory 7×23

& Penny: Poor Mrs. Wolowitz. Should we do something for her?
    Sheldon: I know. Let’s go see the new Spider-Man movie.
    Amy: Sheldon, we’re talking about your friend’s mother! She got hurt.
    Sheldon: I thought that subject had run its course, so I changed it. It’s called reading the room, Amy.

& Howard: Bernie, she’s gonna be off her feet for six to eight weeks. Are you prepared to feed her, wash her and take her to the toilet?
    Bernadette: I would do it for my mother.
    Howard: Yeah, of course you would— you’re a loving person. I’m what my people would call a putz.

& Raj: Aren’t you gonna get 3-D glasses?
    Sheldon: I brought my own. No sense in risking bridge-of-nose herpes.
    Raj: Is that a real thing?
    Sheldon: Well, until they invent nose condoms, I’m not finding out.

& Sheldon: Well, sorry, I don’t have all the ingredients to make chai tea.
    Raj: You don’t have to make me anything.
    Sheldon: No, I do. You’re upset about Emily and you’re Indian. I need to make you chai tea. Now, I have all the ingredients except cardamom seeds. Do you happen to have any on you?
    Raj: Sorry, I left them in my turban.
    Sheldon: Oh, I’ll make English breakfast tea. They destroyed your culture. That’s close enough.

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& Raj: Why don’t women want to be with me?
    Sheldon: An interesting question. Well... good night.

& Raj: Look, I-I do get what you’re saying. Instead of desperately clinging to any woman who will go out with me, I need to work on my fear of being alone.
    Sheldon: I was trying to suggest chemical castration, but... it’s my bedtime, so whatever gets you out the door. Good night.

& Raj: So, uh... how many tattoos?
    Emily: One on my shoulder, one not on my shoulder and one really not on my shoulder.
    Raj: It’s, uh... been a long time since I’ve seen a girl’s... really not her shoulder.

& Penny: I finally realize I don’t need to be famous or have some big career to be happy.
    Leonard: Then what do you need?
    Penny: You, you stupid Pop-Tart!
    Leonard: Oh. Then I guess I’m in.
    Penny: Really? You “guess you’re in”?
    Leonard: Not like, “I guess I’m in.” Like “I guess... I’m in!”
    Penny: Okay. Cool.
    Leonard: So is that it? Are... are we engaged?
    Penny: Yeah, I think so.
    Leonard: All right.

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