Paint in Black

Elementary 2×22

& Holmes: Watson, this is my fifth message in as many hours. Either you’re engaging in a marathon lovemaking session with my brother, or you’ve realized that I was right about him and you just don’t want to admit it. Given his advancing years and no doubt flagging endurance, the latter is a virtual certainty. Anyway, I assure you, I am not looking for any kind of recognition or appreciation, even though I likely deserve both for saving you from months or years or even a lifetime of misery. I merely wanted to...
    — Message complete. Good-bye.

& Marchef: You are very beautiful. For a cop.

& Mycroft: I know why you’re upset.
    Holmes: My very good friend might be murdered by your very bad friends. Brilliant deduction, Mycroft.

& Holmes: Is that what you think she is? Hmm? A simple counterbalance?
    Mycroft: I think she’s the person you love most in the world.

& Mycroft: What’s going on?
    Holmes: I know this man. Mycroft, meet the NSA. NSA, this is Mycroft.

& Holmes: “Reason to believe”?.. You’ve been spying on our Swiss friends.
    Agent McNally: Well, the Swiss are not friends. They’re neutral.

& Holmes: Hands... Exquisite timepiece; shame it has to go.
    Mycroft: They didn’t touch my watch!
    Holmes: Better safe than sorry.

---

& Mycroft: Well, I... I just wanted to let you know I’m sorry. If anything happened to Joan, I’d never forgive myself.
    Holmes: Well, that won’t be an issue. If anything happens to Joan, I will murder you.

& Deron: All right, first of all, it’s not “Lego-o-Lass.” It’s “Legolas,” like the elf from the movies. And the five on the end is just an extra “S.”

& Mycroft: What? Joan asks questions when you’re out and about. I’ve seen it.
    Holmes: ... She’s a trained detective. You are a buffoon.

& Mycroft: I was somewhat skeptical during the third hour of the search. But now I’m impressed.
    Holmes: As I said, it’s all a matter of perspective. That and angles.

& Mycroft: What?
    Holmes: You have the intellectual tools to make simple deductions. Your failure to apply them in an energetic fashion is a constant source of befuddlement. Look around you... Really... look around.

& Kurt Yoder: You have to do something! Your brother, he’s-he’s insane.
    Mycroft: Yes. That’s always been a matter of some debate within the family. Various experts have been consulted, but an exact diagnosis has proved elusive.

& Holmes: Now, you stand between me and the recovery of someone for whom I care with all the depth I am capable of mustering. She is remarkable in ways that you could never imagine. I would trade your life for hers without a moment’s thought. So... I am going to use these devices on you... until you tell me the location of your stolen list. I will harvest whatever amount of your flesh is necessary to get what I want. Do you understand me so far?

& Holmes: See, the military knows that every man will speak if the correct tools are applied, right?

& Holmes: Did you know you can choke any extremity on the human body? You simply need to deny it oxygen. It become quite useless quite permanently very, very quickly. Say auf Wiedersehen to your left hand, Herr Yoder.

--
On the IMDb