You Knew It Was a Snake

You're the Worst 3×12

Gretchen: It's like being molested by an audio book. What is this?
Jimmy: "The Width of a Peach." My masterpiece of multi-generational sexploitative literature.

Jimmy: I stayed up all night and wrote 35 amazing pages just to spite you. So, ha! Consider yourself thoroughly spited.

Lindsay: What? I'm supposed to wear pajamas like an old?

Lindsay: My body, my choice.

Lindsay: Me and my sisters, we fought for this right for millenniums. This is why Margaret Thatcher went to prison.

Dorothy: Look, I admit it is a good thing, okay, yes. Sometimes minorities get jobs over white people, even when they're both equally qualified, or maybe the minority is slightly less qualified. But I think that that is good for the world, and I simply got you these cool and funky pastries 'cause they're cool and funky, not because they're Latino, or whatever.

Dorothy: Look, can we at least agree that the true enemy here is the white male?
Jimmy: Whoa! Not me. I'm an immigrant. Our story is so tragic. Do you know how many of us drown every day trying to get over here? And the true villain is the white American male...
Paul: Bad things happen to white American men, too. Real bad things.

Jimmy: You have dropped eight iPhones in the last year... Child-rearing requires skill. It's not the same as binge-watching a season of Exemplify.
Gretchen: Oh my god! That is a so sexist and man's planning. You a Gamergater? Am I living with a Gamergater?

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Paul: Oh, look, wife. I'm about to rip my lung tissue asunder with the devil's tobacco because my life has been destroyed by the woman I love!
Lindsay: Your body, your choice.

Gretchen: WHAT?!?!
Jimmy: Nothing. I just... Sometimes I look at you and I think, "How did this person get in my house?"

Dorothy: Knock, knock. White lady visiting from the Aryan zone. You still mad?

Paul: Becca and Vernon had their baby. It's a girl. Tallulah.
Lindsay: Ew.

Gretchen: I think this may be impossible.
Jimmy: But can't that be okay? I mean, the-the vast majority of all human effort, however great or miniscule, ends in failure. So, what are your options?! You just ad-admit pre-defeat because the odds are that you're gonna be right? Or you do it anyway?

Jimmy: Maybe we're a success... regardless of the outcome, because... we tried. Maybe there's beauty in the struggle against near certain failure.

Paul: I guess... in the end, we were just two stars born light-years apart. You need to find someone in your own constellation, Lindsay...

Paul: You stabbed me. You cuckolded me. You ruined my life... Better lawyer up, bitch.

Gretchen: We didn't solve anything...
Jimmy: I know.
Gretchen: Okay.

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