Maleant Data Systems Solutions

Silicon Valley 3×5

& Richard: So, what I think maybe e should do is, um, take a little tip from your chart there, and we, uh, compromise.
    Barker: Compromise is the shared hypotenuse of the conjoined triangles of success!
    Richard: Mm-hmm, yep.

& Jared: It’s funny, we’re named Pied Piper, but we’re beset with rats. Little rascals.

& Richard: Hold on. I thought you were going to show me pictures of boxes. Like data storage devices.
    Dang: Before I can actualize a box, you and I need to develop a shared aesthetic vocabulary. Otherwise, I have no idea what you’re going to want.

& Dinesh: What the fuck? Why isn’t this working?
    Richard: Gilfoyle’s preprocessor and my compressor should integrate seamlessly. This should work.
    Gilfoyle: I may have made my preprocessor slightly faster than you asked me to, Richard.
    Richard: What do you mean? How much slightly faster?
    Gilfoyle: 200 megs per second.
    Dinesh: You dick. That’s eight times as fast as the specs required. No wonder our modules aren’t running at the same speed. Why would you do that?
    Gilfoyle: I tried to make it slow. I really did. But I’m not Dinesh. It’s very difficult for me to do shitty work. So I added a differencing library and then the whole thing just took off like a rocket.

& Dinesh: Just cause making the box sucks doesn’t mean we have to suck at making it.

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& Richard: Well, hey, uh, what are you doing standing around here talking about it? You should go do it, you know. Go and make the damn thing. Make it a jaguar ’cause I have a feeling this baby is going to purr.
    Dinesh: I don’t care either, but, you know, I think maybe a gazelle is more like it. Cause it’s synonymous with speed.
    Gilfoyle: Fuck that. A cheetah’s faster. And it kills fucking gazelles. But I really don’t fucking care. But definitely cheetah.
    Dinesh: Or a gazelle.
    Richard: Also, don’t throw away the whole jaguar thing, ’cause they’re pretty quick too.
    Dinesh: Or a gazelle.

& Erlich: Your tenant has tenants?!
    Jared: Yeah. He’s Airbnbing my Airbnb...

& Big Head: Did you want to...?
    Erlich: Yes, it would be polite for you to invite me into your home and offer me a Push Pop, yes.

& Jared: Look what you guys built. You can’t help but be elegant, you’re like Audrey Hepburn.

& Erlich: All right, Big Head. You want to play it that way? If it’s a fight you want, then a fight you shall have.

& Gavin: Consider the bulldog. A grotesque monstrosity born of relentless inbreeding. Riddled with sinusitis, crippled by joint pain. Chronically flatulent. A kindly pet, or humanity’s cruelest mistake?..

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