The Robbery

Seinfeld 1×3

& Jerry: It’s a finger. What does it mean? Someone shows me one of their fingers... and I’m supposed to feel bad. Is that the way it’s supposed to work?

& Jerry: I am the Master Packer!

& Jerry: What you must understand, Elaine... packing is not different than leading men into battle. You’ve got to know the strengths and weaknesses of every soldier in that platoon. From a collapsible toothbrush to a pair of ordinary black socks.

& Jerry: And one more thing, Benes... regarding sexual activity. Strictly prohibited. But if you absolutely must, do us all a big favour... do it in the tub.

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& Jerry: Two bedrooms? Why do I need two bedrooms? I’ve got enough trouble maintaining activity in one.

& Elaine: For me it’s a step up. It’s like moving from Iceland to Finland.

& Kessler: You have insurance, right, buddy?
    Jerry: No.
    Kessler: How can you not have insurance?!
    Jerry: Because I spent my money on the Clapco D-29. It’s the most impenetrable lock on the market today. It has only one design flaw: The door... must be closed!

& Jerry: How late are the stores open? I’m thinking of maybe buying a new TV... and smashing it over my head.

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+ quotes on the IMDb