Something My Gynecologist Said

Two and a Half Men 10×8

& Alan: For the record, he gets paid to go down there. I do it for the love of the game.

& Walden: Who asked her out?
    Alan: Her gynecologist.
    Walden: Well, at least he knows what he’s getting into.

& Shari: Well, it would appear that a bicycle’s not the only thing you can ride.
    Walden: I’m also good with bulls and merry-go-rounds.

& Walden: What’s this?
    Shari: It’s money for a taxi.
    Walden: I don’t need that.
    Shari: Sweetie, don’t be proud. Take the money.

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& Shari: How are things going with your book?.. The one you’re trying to finish?
    Walden: Oh, about the book. It’s good. It’s going good. Writing words. Making sentences.
    Shari: What’s it about?
    Walden: Okay. Yeah, it’s about this, uh, guy... named Alan.
    Shari: Mm-hm.
    Walden: He... And he lives with his brother in this fabulous Malibu beach house.
    Shari: And?
    Walden: And the brother dies.

& Shari: Are they gay?
    Walden: No, no, no. They’re just... They’re just friends.
    Shari: Well, that’s a bit far-fetched, isn’t it?
    Walden: What? No. Well, it’s totally plausible. They have these adventures together. It’s funny.
    Shari: It’s a good thing you’re pretty.

& Alan: Look at you. Bought some new clothes, huh?
    Walden: Nope. Somebody bought new clothes for me. Shari took her boy toy shopping in Beverly Hills. I felt like Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.

& Alan: I’ve just come to the realization... that I don’t wanna end up alone with my nuts in the toilet.

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